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Going through old issues of the Wrestling Observer Newsletter and posting highlights in my own words, continuing in the footsteps of daprice82. For anyone interested, I highly recommend signing up for the actual site at f4wonline and checking out the full archives.
• PREVIOUS •
1987
FUTURE YEARS ARCHIVE:
The Complete Observer Rewind Archive and 2002 by daprice82


1-4-1988	1-11-1988	1-18-1988	1-25-1988
2-1-1988	2-8-1988	2-15-1988	2-22-1988
2-29-1988	3-7-1988	3-14-1988	3-21-1988
3-28-1988	4-4-1988	4-11-1988	4-18-1988
4-25-1988	5-2-1988	5-9-1988	5-16-1988
5-23-1988	5-30-1988	6-6-1988	6-13-1988
6-20-1988	6-27-1988	7-4-1988	7-11-1988
7-18-1988	7-25-1988	8-1-1988	*

As far as the Bruiser Brody murder case goes, Invader #1 (fuck Invader #1) has given no explanation yet, and that’s led to a lot of speculation. Everyone wants an answer, and if anyone else knows, they’re not answering. The situation in Puerto Rico has deteriorated, as many wrestlers are boycotting the WWC. Some are worried they might get killed to, to which Dave says that to his knowledge there was no conspiracy and that after the Brody family, Invader’s family (for having him in the family), it’s WWC who have lost the most in the wake of things. Wrestlers have left them, they’ve been excoriated by the media, their image is perhaps irreparably damaged, they’ve lost two of their biggest draws, and fans in the area have been turned off from wrestling. Considering that, he finds it hard to imagine a credible conspiracy theory implicating WWC, considering just what the murder has cost them. And yet, if evidence were to emerge that shows there was a conspiracy, Dave thinks WWC should be shunned and boycotted as if they were South Africa. But running WWC out of business won’t bring Brody back. Dave does think this should make promotions rethink permitting weapons like guns and knives in the locker rooms, though.
The NWA is experiencing significant cash-flow issues. They’ve had to take out one or two large loans in excess of $300,000 in order to pay tv stations and cover wrestler pay. And if you think those balloon payments for some of the top guys that were supposed to come due back in May would be covered by this, nah. Those payments still aren’t happening yet. Reportedly, the loans come from TBS and serve as a down payment should a purchase agreement be reached. They also took a similar-sized loan out from a Charlotte bank. At this point, Dave is comfortable calling it: Jim Crockett Promotions is dead in the water unless a sale is made or they have a miraculous sudden recovery. Such a recovery is not going to happen, and if they don’t sell to TBS, then TBS will take their loan back from the ppv money when that comes through, leaving the NWA to die.
Remember how last week Dave got conflicting reports on the Great American Bash buyrate? Well, the 3.5%-4% touted by TBS is smoke and mirrors. The actual buyrate would appear to be around 2%, final numbers coming next week. Not a money loser, but marginally profitable at best. At this point Dave dissects the reasons the buyrate was so far below expectations: stale talent and uninteresting matches, fans turned off by Dusty finishes, and tv ratings for the NWA plummeting over the last quarter (the TBS Saturday show, usually in the top three cable shows, fell to number 11 this quarter and fell behind both WWF shows on USA). Dave talks a lot about numbers and I’m a literature person, so in direct language: all NWA programming is declining in viewership and they never had a chance to get a higher buyrate because their overall viewership is too low to support one. In summary, the Bash tour may temporarily increase house show numbers, but there’s nothing to suggest it’s driving tv numbers, proving that it’s ultimately a short-term solution incapable of addressing the long-term problem. Further analysis to come next week as the final numbers become apparent.
As far as TBS buying NWA goes, we’re coming to a point where timing is critical.If key NWA figures leave the company before the sale goes through, then it’s going to be even harder to get things moving in a positive direction. And Dave thinks it’s very likely a number of big names will jump ship in the next few weeks. They’re all free agents, since their contracts have been voided by the lack of those balloon payments they were supposed to get in May. Dave identifies a few changes that need to happen. Reformat the tv, give three or four fresh faces major pushes. No more squashes and every guy getting an interview per show. Market the wrestlers, not “see the NWA.” Ric Flair’s role needs to change. Same with the Road Warriors.
On July 7, Governor Robert Casey of Pennsylvania vetoed the bill to deregulate pro wrestling. Among the more significant of his objections to deregulation was that it would result in a revenue shortfall for the state athletic commission of $80,000.
Dave makes a few corrections on the coverage of Brody from the past few weeks. He went to Iowa State, not the University of Iowa (which is a shame, I thought it was cool Big E and I went to the same school as him, but apparently we didn’t). Dave also corrects his birthday, his funeral day (Wednesday, not Tuesday), and a couple other minor items like his theme song in Japan.
Atlanta station WATL’s wrestling block has been canceled effective the last week of August. Joe Pedecino has signed an agreement with channel 69, starting Labor Day, to bring a wrestling block to that channel.
Is Paul Orndorff dead? No. Stop writing to Dave every week because you read it in some other magazine that Orndorff is dead, because he’s alive. He especially hasn’t died from getting hit with a bowling ball or from AIDS. Seriously, people.

Watch: Paul Orndorff proves he’s alive as recently as 2019 with an interview about his career

CWF did an angle on their July 18 tv tapings involving Willie B. Hert (Pez Whatley), his son, and Paul E. Dangerously. Willie brought out his son, Paul questioned his parentage, the kid punches Paul, Eddie Gilbert comes out and beats up the kid, bada bing, bada boom, we got a feud.
Robert Gibson quit the NWA after getting paid only $1,100 for a week of Bash shows. As Dave understands it, going back was more Ricky Morton’s idea anyway. Morton may not be long for the company, though, if he wants the team to stay together.
The Midnight Express is starting to get cheered and look to be positioned for a face turn. What that means for Cornette is anybody’s guess, because babyface managers are tricky to get right.
The July 21 Great American Bash show in Cincinnati had a WarGames match that Dave prints 5 stars for. Again, wish it were clear that this was from whoever reported on the card for Dave and that he hasn’t seen it, because that’s probably the correct read here.
All Japan is putting a rocket on Stan Hansen’s back and he’s leaving fans in chanting “Brody” every night. If you thought Hansen was over before, it’s nothing compared to how over he is now. On July 27 he beat Tenryu by countout to capture the PWF and United National titles, and two days later he and Terry Gordy beat Jumbo Tsuruta and Yoshiaki Yatsu to win All Japan’s annual World’s Strongest Tag Determination League tournament.

Watch: Stan Hansen vs. Genichiro Tenryu, July 27, 1988

Additionally, All Japan’s August 29 show in Budokan Hall is being rebuilt as a Bruiser Brody Memorial show. The main events will still be voted on by fans.
Lots of foreign talent coming in for New Japan’s tour from the end of August to late September. Names include Vader, the Gaspar Brothers (Bob Orton Jr. and Karl Moffatt), Scott Hall, the Great Kokina (Yokozuna), and Black Tiger (an English wrestler).
Riki Choshu pinned Inoki on July 21 during a six-man tag match after a lariat. And he did it again the next night in a singles match, which was so noteworthy it was the front page of the Nikkan Sports page the following morning.
The magazines in Japan think it’s likely Akira Maeda will be wrestling Bob Backlund in December. They’re also predicting UWF will continue selling out every show they put on through the end of the year.
The most recent tv ratings in Japan show an interesting picture. All Japan drew a 6.5 on July 17 for a Hansen & Gordy vs. Tsuruta and Wajima main event. New Japan topped them with a 7.2 on July 16 featuring Kengo Kimura vs. Riki Choshu. Top of the heap, though, are All Japan Women, who drew a 7.5 with the Crush Girls vs. Mitsuko Nishiwaki and Mika Suzuki.
JWP did their Devil Masami vs. Shinobu Kandori match on July 14, and from what Dave can put together from photos, it looks like an incredible match. It was a 30 minute war which ended with both women bleeding a lot and Dave thinks it ended in a double disqualification. Close - draw by double count out in the ring as both women were spent and had lost too much blood to continue. Go out of your way to watch this, it’s an absolutely phenomenal match.

Watch: Shinobu Kandori vs. Devil Masami

Dave’s received two reports in the past week that the OWF has folded. More on that next week, but for now their July 8 show drew 65 in Gresham, Oregon, so that's not hard to believe.
The July 25 Memphis show drew the biggest gate since Lawler won the AWA title and was headlined by a LawleVon Erich broadway with both the World Class and AWA belts on the line. See that? Isn’t it much easier to just do a time limit draw that’s a great match (everyone was raving about it) than to mess up the rules on title switches? Too bad it wasn’t televised.
[Memphis] For the first time in modern wrestling history, a cake appeared in a wrestling angle and nobody’s face wound up covered with it. Bonus points if you can find this online.
Also in Memphis they’re teasing a face turn for Brickhouse Brown, but he and Robert Fuller keep reconciling despite Fuller continually being racist to him. We’re talking having a party featuring the Stud Stable on the tv show and Fuller giving Brown a watermelon and making racist remarks.
AWA’s big show in the Metrodome is either going to be on November 4 or 5. The Met Sports Center isn’t even sure.
Curt Hennig started with WWF on Friday night and has been suspended for life from AWA.
USA Pro Wrestling tag team champions the Rock ‘n’ Roll RPMs celebrated a year as tag champions during the promotion’s July 17 tv taping. Very impressive, considering the promotion is only 6 months old. They had a cake. It wound up with Mike Davis’s face shoved into it and pieces thrown at Tommy Lane’s face. Alas, poor cake. If you were in Memphis, you may have survived.
USA Pro also made a bit of what might be a desperate move to rekindle interest by having promoter and color commentator Ron Fuller clear out the ring during a big heel beatdown. Fuller’s basically retired from wrestling, but Dave thinks he’s getting back in the ring because he sees it as the only way to keep interest up and avoid shutting down for good (it doesn’t work).
Former wrestler Larry Hamilton is running for sheriff of Buchanan County, Missouri.
English wrestler and manager J.R. Foley, who worked mainly in western Canada in the 60s and 70s, died on July 24 of lung cancer. He was 50, and known for managing guys like Dynamite Kid, Badnews Allen, and the Honkytonk Man in Stampede.
Bruiser Brody’s death has been hitting some more news outlets. This week’s The Sporting News had a story on his death. The Reporters, a show on the Fox network, will be airing a piece in the next few weeks, while Entertainment Tonight ran their Brody and Adonis stories on Monday and Tuesday (with both stories featuring a young Dave Meltzer). The reason for the increase in publicity about the murder compared to last week appears to be a column from the LA Times famed sportswriter Scott Ostler.

Read: The Night the Fun Was Drained out of Pro Wrestling

Iceman King Parsons was offered the opportunity to do a tour in South Africa, but turned it down. Considering South Africa is still under Apartheid and Parsons is a Black man, I don’t blame him one bit for not going to South Africa.
”Cactus Jack Foley, who is one of the top Northeastern independent workers, may show up in the Central States.”
One of the letters this week is a poem called The Jobber. I’m printing it in full here because I love poetry, including bad poetry, and this needs to be shared (including original, as-printed spelling errors). I may go into what’s not working for me poetically here in the comments, but for now just read this amazing thing.

I was at home with my wife watching TV, When the telephone rang and the call was for me, That very next night in Nashville, Tennessee, They wanted me to do a job on national TV.
I’d make $65, the going rate for chumps, It was clearly understood that I’d be taking all the bumps, So I told their stooge that I would be there, He said “thanks very much,” but I knew he didn’t care.
Got all of my gear and packed my bag, That ride the next day would be such a drag Left my house at four so I wouldn't be late, Then started hauling ass up the interstate.
Stopped at a store to hear, "which one are you?" Those idiot marks just didn't have a clue If I was Hogan or Savage, they wouldn't have to ask, But I'm only a jobber, with a lowly wrestling task.
Arrived at the building and walked to the stage door, And got cussed out by a rat, such a pitiful whore, As I headed to the heels dressing room, My ego felt shattered, for I faced certain doom.
Strut into the room and forced a fake smile, "How ya been doing brother, haven't seen you in a while," Found me a spot and started getting ready, I was sweating like hell but my nerves held steady.
Up walked the booker to give me the finish, As I felt my pride so painfully diminish, He wanted us to do the "old Pearl Harbor," The face would make the comeback, I'd end up the jobber.
Then the bell rang, my match was up first, I was suddenly stricken with a bad case of thirst, "First match get out there," the bookers' voice did hiss, I was busy taking my third nervous piss.
So I stomped tot he ring to the sound of jeers, Then out waltzed the baby to a round of rousing cheers, I'm a pretty tough dude who can kick some bass, Too bad I don't fit in with the front office brass.
I'd take deca and D-Bol and some Winstrol V, If only the pencil would do something with me, My name was announced to the deafening boos, As I envied my opponent, cause he wasn't gonna lose.
All wnet as planned, and well, "that was that," My shoulders got pinned to the middle of the mat, TV matches are short, and this was no exception, I stormed back to the room feeling total dejection.
Took a hot shower and washed off the seat, I'd be back on the road, they'd be taking a jet, Said bye to the boys and then to the booker, I had turned my trick like a 300 pound hooker.
Oh how I wanted that booker to clobber, But had to keep my cool, I was only a jobber, Don't get me wrong, no apology was needed, I made the babyface look good, so I totally succeeded.
Drve back down the interstate guzzling a beer, Would I always be a jobber, what an agonizing fear? But deep down I know all that really matters, you see, Is that I play my role well, and am very proud of me

We’re starting to get letters about Brody now, and the first one is from one Johnny Black, who counted Brody as a friend. He talks about how Brody was unique in being a guy who had the promoters crawling to him instead of the other way around. And while he may have been hard to work with, he did everything to make sure the fans got their money’s worth. Black recalls seeing Brody stay behind after shows to take pictures and sign autographs for half an hour or more and how Brody didn’t understand why any wrestler wouldn’t take a few minutes for the fans. It’s an interesting insight into Brody’s philosophy: the promoters ultimately aren’t really the ones who pay the wrestlers. The fans are. Treat the fans well and you’ll always have a job. Another writer remarks about meeting Brody shortly after Mike Von Erich died and how much Brody hated WCCW’s exploitation of Mike’s death, and a third (a superfan in Greensboro who was almost a prototype for today’s front row regulars like Green Shirt Guy) reminisces about the first time he got to see Brody live and how, as Brody got ganged up on he called to Stan Hansen and said Brody needed his help. Hansen replied “Bruiser Brody doesn’t need any help” as Brody emerged at the top of the heap. A sad memory now.
Dave reports the Joe Malenko “one-match tournament” win of the Global Jr. title on the July 23 tv taping again. Still confused about the one-match tournament concept, but at least we know why the title was vacant - the previous champ, Steve Collins, “couldn’t make weight.” Also, apparently the Malenkos were fired recently for reasons Dave doesn’t know yet.
The card for WWF’s Summerslam looks like a dud to Dave. They’re clearly counting on Hogan/Savage vs. Andre/DiBiase with Ventura as referee being enough to pull in viewers. Demolition vs. the Hart Foundation for the tag titles should be okay, and they’ve got Honkytonk Man vs. Beefcake for the Intercontinental title and are billing it as the last time they’ll ever wrestle each other, so it looks like a Beefer title win is coming. WWF’s goal for the show is a 6% buyrate. Historically a hot headline and meh undercard outperforms a stacked undercard and weak main event, but for a national ppv, you really should want to stack the whole card, Dave thinks. Time to find out if WWF can successfully sell a big show off just one match.
In addition to Curt Hennig being in WWF, Gene Okerlund has returned. Apparently this happens about every year or two where Gene and Vince get hot at each other and things blow up (Gene quit for a day at the Slammy awards, in one recent instance), but Gene comes back because the money is too good. His duties are being relaxed a bit, though, and he’s going to mainly do only major things like NBC specials and Summerslam updates, rather than doing interviews on the road or for the All-American Wrestling show.
No Holds Barred will hit theaters in 1989, just after Wrestlemania V. Dave wonders if Hulk Hogan might possibly win the title at Wrestlemania right before the movie comes out (hmmm…). Obviously that would be ludicrous. He should win it three weeks after the movie comes out and has proven itself to be a total flop like David Arquette, greatest WCW champion of all time, did.
Blackthorne Publishing will soon begin releasing quarterly WWF comics. Dave’s surprised it took them so long to do that. Don't worry, Dave. It'll take a bit more time, because this doesn't seem to go anywhere and the first regular WWF comic won't appear until 1991, at least as far as I can find with a quick search.

NEXT WEEK: Big crowd for WWF in Milwaukee on July 31, Great American Bash official numbers, OWF and USA Pro out of business, Kevin Von Erich running World Class, and more

Underrated Audio Dramas: Back Half of 2020

Hello r audiodrama! We survived 2020!
According to u/thecambridgegeek 's AudioDramaDebut Twitter, he tracked 1363 audio drama/fiction/RPG debuts in 2020. That's a lot of shows to be competing for attention and some may have fallen through the cracks. I've a curated list of debuts from July 2020 to now, that still have 20 or fewer ratings on the iTunes store. Links are either to landing pages with multiple subscription options or directly to RSS feeds. If you have suggestions for shows that I may have missed, please feel free to add in the comments. If you're interested in exploring past posts I have made to highlight underrated podcasts, check these links out: 1, 2, 3 , 4, 5, 6. Some of those podcasts went on to acquire a large following but others could use your help.
There's also been interest in supporting podcasts by Black creators so I've highlighted the relevant podcasts.

Little Montgomery (Comedy, Complete): Megan and Kimmy are fourteen-years-old, best friends, and currently planning to commit grand larceny against country music star Rick Montgomery at his concert tonight. As they put their plan into play, songs will sung, secrets will be revealed, and teenage girls will find out how difficult it is to exact revenge.
October Jones & Fish With Legs (Fantasy, Family Friendly): Fish with Legs, a fish with legs, is the Elemental Creature of water. She and her human best friend October Jones are trying to stop an evil two-headed snake from releasing a terrible monster that will destroy the world! October's brooding teenage angst and Fish's bubbly optimism make for an interesting pair as they set out together to warn the other Elemental Creatures about the snakes’ devious plan...
Seeds (Historical Fiction, Complete): A new podcast series based on the incredible true story of the world’s first seed bank. Established in St Petersburg in 1921 by Nikolai Vavilov, it contained vital samples of crops and plants from all over the world to guard against famine and preserve the future of biodiversity.
If Anyone Should Find This (Apocalyptic, Weird Horror, Complete): The world is changing. Will you change with it? “If Anyone Should Find This” is a 9 episode audio drama that follows two security guards as their lives are forever transformed.
Nicked (Friendship, Family Friendly, Complete): Since childhood, Nicoletta Nowell and Sarah Locke were inseparable. But the start of eighth grade marked Nicoletta’s sudden transformation from best friend to relentless bully with seemingly no cause. Come December, Sarah is resigned to the new state of affairs until she is swept up in a plot to straighten her bully out by Colzsákos—a Christmas faerie of the Holly Court, specializing in reforming naughty children. It seems like a dream come true, but is Col as ‘good’ as he seems, and can his reformation methods be trusted? A little Mean Girls, a little A Christmas Carol, and a little Labyrinth, Nicked is a holiday faerie tale about good kids, bad kids, and best friendship gone cold.
Crypt I.D. (Cryptid): The world is stranger than it seems. Incomprehensible creatures, inexplicable events, the weird and unusual are lurking around every corner. Most people will never see it once. This audio drama follows the experiences of a woman who can't seem to escape it. Note: Ignore the D&D episodes and description. The Crypt I.D. episodes are scripted.
Eternal Strife (Comedy): "Life's a bitch - and then you can't die" Life. Death. God. Immortality. Aliens ... a flatulent self-righteous seagull. This high concept comedy series has it all!
Today's Lucky Winner (Comedy, Supernatural): “Life may not be fair, but the afterlife tries to be.” That’s the motto of the DMV. (The Department of Mishaps and Violence).When Dawn Menendez finds out that she’s met her untimely demise in a freak curling iron/fire sprinkler accident, she’s met with a posthumous opportunity. She was the 777th soul reaped by the department that day. She now has the opportunity to go back to earth for an entire year, chaperoned by the Reaper who took her soul. The only hitch? Before she’s sent back to earth, she learns that her cosmic scale has been found wanting. Her soul weighs just enough to get sent to a hell dimension. What could she have possibly done? All she did was play MMO’s and go to work. Her first night on earth, her reaper suggests that her accidental demise may have been murder. If she can prove she was murdered, she gets to be reincarnated, and avoid going to hell. Now, Dawn has a year to prove she was murdered and balance the cosmic scales in her favor. Things would be a lot easier if her Reaper would stop getting high and help her.
The Embers of Eden (Science Fiction, Thriller): Rival officers Sumner and Hewitt have found themselves trapped inside the mysterious ship which destroyed their own. Finding the truth about its origin may be just as important as staying alive. They'll have to set aside their personal conflict to withstand alien attacks, killer drones, the vacuum of space, and creatures which defy nature. Is the priority to escape or thwart a new danger to all human worlds? What secrets still burn like embers? Each episode of this science fiction adventure switches between the perspectives of Hewitt and Sumner as they fight for survival and answers.
The Legion Tapes (Post-apocalyptic, Science Fiction): The Legion Tapes are selections from an archive chronicling the world after the end. The alien Legion takes over worlds and absorbs the sentients of those worlds. They've assimilated eleven species so far, and humanity is next on their list. But even after the nations of the world fall, and even after being reduced to communicating solely by radio, humanity's fighting back. Season 1 (subtitled The Archivist) begins four years and fifteen days after the Legion's arrival on Earth. Normally content to listen, record, and edit tapes for the Archive, Owl finds herself drawn into more and more danger after a mysterious car brings the Legion to her door.
Dinosaur Hunter (Time Travel, Adventure): Donovan King is a Paleontologist and Dinosaur Denier (what?!) who has developed a way to travel back in time to disprove the existence of dinosaurs. The plan goes awry, Donovan and his videographer Karl get stuck in the Cretaceous Period unprepared…while his lab assistant Holly tries to fix the machine to get them back. Their survival is in serious jeopardy, and not just because they’re being hunted by hungry beasts or dying from exposure.There is much more at stake...
My Parallel Life (Young Adult, Parallel Universes): Daniel Jones' perfect life just took a sharp turn for the worse. His parents separated, he has to move to an apartment in the city and go to a PUBLIC school (ugh!) where everyone is a TOTAL SLACKER and no one cares about his high GPA and PRESTIGIOUS WRITING AWARDS, and worst of all, his mom just up and left the country. Daniel is working up a plan to make his life more acceptable, when he discovers a strange door... A door that takes him to a parallel life where his parents hadn't separated.
The Devil Hates Mondays (Workplace Comedy): A supernatural audiocomedy about a Regular Guy that gets caught up in a Not-So-Regular situation.
Clarion Dawn (Cyberpunk, Complete): In a disquieting future, all of humanity is united by the System, the ultimate in communications technology that connects all minds simultaneously. But in the distant fringes of outer worlds, agitators plot to separate human consciousness and society from the System's power; it falls on Captain Kennick Anderson to stop them, but in the twilight solitude of space he's left to wonder where his loyalties really lie. "Clarion Dawn" is a tense thriller that explores strange new ideas about human nature, in the style of classic 20th century science fiction.
Russell Gets Revenge (Dark Comedy, Complete): Russell Gets Revenge is a pitch black comedy about a man on a quest for vengeance for the murder of his wife. We follow him and his friends and family as he struggles through all the indignities of being a hapless accountant trying to hunt down a murderer.
Through The Attic Door (Comedy, Surreal): Step through the attic door, and into the wacky and whimsical world of Hotel Elsewhere! Join The Scientist, The Gremlin, Brian The Robot and the colourful residents of the Hotel in this narrative broadcast about secret mice revolutions, unexpected friendships, and all the radio hijacking you can handle!
The Strange Tales of Virgil Kaylock (Horror): Set in the 1920’s. “The Tales” tell the story of Virgil Kaylock. A modest and insecure young man whose life takes the strangest of turns as he battles with dark, supernatural forces and confronts his own feelings of inadequacy and fear. His adventure takes him to a haunted Moor, a cursed Sailing Ship, the Hellfire caves and the Arctic wastes as he battles with an incomprehensible evil. But why? Why do the forces of darkness pursue him? He will ultimately discover the shocking truth.
Blast into Adventure! (Drama, Complete): A COVID-quarantined suburban dad starts listening to a 1940s radio show that shouldn’t exist. Then the show starts listening back.
Moving On by Cinema Viscera (Drama, Comedy): Molly has always had trouble facing the harsh realities of life, so when her partner of seven years, Jake, suddenly walks out on her, Molly’s subconscious gives her a unique coping tool in the guise of a larger than life imaginary version of Jake who won't leave her alone. With the help of her best friends Delilah and Zack - both with problems of their own - Molly has to face the hard fact that she has been dumped and find a way to regain her sense of self if she has any hope of getting rid of her imaginary boyfriend...
TIGHTS (Superhero, Comedy, Complete): Geoff wants to be a superhero. But he's not very super.
Vamps (Comedy, Urban Fantasy): Glizelda, Mariana, Ophelia, and Jean have been stuck in a castle together for a long time. A very, VERY long time...
Shark-Man (Comedy, Family Friendly, Complete): Shark-Man is a 9 part series. It tells the story of Dewey Dorsalfine and his journey into shark magic and discovering his true shark nature on the Oregon Coast. This is a fantasy story meant for the whole family. It involves silly language and magical thinking.
Pershing Radio (Post-Apocalyptic): A young woman crawls out of the bank vault she was working in when the bombs fell and finds the world destroyed around her. She steps over her dead coworkers and crosses the highway to break into an old radio building. Unsure if the broadcast equipment still works, she uses it to try and contact survivors, wherever they may be, and until she finds them, she reports on her surroundings, both the terrifying and the benign.
Papal Aspirations (Comedy, Mystery): Pope Pius XIII is dead. Accident? Plucky reporter Meredith Blanc-Schwartz isn't so sure, so she makes her way to Rome to ask the Vatican’s very holy men some very uncomfortable questions. (Voiced entirely by two young ingenues / novice voice actresses.)
The Stranger (Horror): When comedy podcast bro Julian Black discovers his great-grandfather's tapes, he assumes it's an immersive radio drama. That was his first mistake. Posting the tapes online? Well, now he's asking for it. He'll come face-to-face with supernatural creatures as he's plunged into a centuries-old mystery. And at its heart is a mysterious Stranger in a dark suit.
The Petrol Station (Horror): Nina Sudbrooke is a young girl who works the nights at her local remote petrol station. One evening she encounters something...stranger and now is desperate to tell somebody, anybody. The Petrol station is a semi horror podcast about the lonely world of working the graveyard shift in the middle of nowhere.
The TARN Conspiracy (Thriller): When a teen boy goes missing from the remote logging town of Archangel, Brandon Jones, a tabletop game store owner and conspiracy theorist, can’t help but see the similarities to his own sister’s unsolved disappearance from twenty years earlier. He decides to publish an investigative podcast drawing attention to Thomas’s case before it goes as cold as his sister’s, but soon discovers that the reason his sister's case remained unsolved may be more sinister than he imagined. The TARN Conspiracy is a fictional story told as a series of investigative reports that's perfect for fans Twin Peaks, and The X-Files.
This is Where We Go (Science Fiction, Black Creator, Complete): This series is inspired by the OCTAVIA BUTLER quote from PARABLE OF THE SOWER: “All that you touch/You Change. All that you Change/Changes you. The only lasting truth/Is Change./God is Change.” A future built on commodity and access is altered forever with the disappearance of it’s main life force. With the fate of the universe rocked by change, four strangers find the answer to survival in each other. Four strangers, four paths, one destination.
This Mortal Coil (Comedy, Mystery, Complete): When a Hamlet-inspired murder ruins her dress rehearsal, Elissa’s delighted. The detective’s an old actor pal and she’d forgotten her lines anyway. Lured in by the promise of Jammie Dodgers, Elissa pursues a dastardly killer with a penchant for Shakespeare.
The Rift (Steampunk): A steampunk, monster-hunting adventure through Victorian England and the surrounding Universes. It's steampunk Victorian England and monsters are invading the otherwise peaceful balls and tea parties. The Baroness, gutsy and eccentric, funds a team of monster hunters that include her brother, a scholar who recently found out he was the father of a teenager, her protegee, a young scientist whose mother wants her to spend more time flirting than tinkering with machines, and her man-servant Gunner. At its heart, it's a character piece about finding yourself in a world that won't accept you, but building the community that will lift you up.
Grounds (Drama, Black Creator): GROUNDS is the story of 5 Black Professors at a 4 year PWI. A fictitious college and town in the rural south, which is the home of a predominately white 4 year college with students totaling 1700 with 15% of those self-identifying as students of color. 7% of those are Black. The story follows the lives of five Black professors. The only full time, tenure track Black lecturers who work at Morris & Wilkins University. It highlights the trials, obstacles, and joys of maintaining a Black existence within a white academic structure.
The Rest is Electric (Science Fiction): In the year 2109 humans and robots work alongside each other as coworkers. Jordan Mede, a human employee of Somnotech, is transferred to the entirely robot run manufacturing department. While initially the transfer seems to be the result of a clerical error, Jordan soon begins to suspect that there’s something more sinister going on…
Swiss and Lali hijack Hollywood(Comedy): Swiss and Lali Hijack Hollywood follows two young L.A. slackers who take over Hollywood by becoming accidental con artists, all so they can give up “the hustle” and retire at their dream beach house in Malibu. Utilizing multi-media platforms that span across audio, animation, and live-action video, Swiss and Lali creates a colorful world of dysfunction, shenanigans, bamboozling, and most importantly, friendship.
The Way We Haunt Now (Supernatural): Eulalie Elizabeth Reed is haunted by lots of things. Paths not taken. Failed relationships. Mistakes. Fears. Hopes. But she’s never been properly haunted before. That’s about to change. The Way We Haunt Now is a lighthearted horror audio drama about female friendships, found family, and fighting the narratives that try to define us––even in the afterlife. Oh, and ghosts. Did we mention ghosts?
Absolutely No Adventures (Fantasy, Comedy): Absolutely No Adventures is a fantasy (un)adventure podcast that follows Sig, the owner of Signature Eats bakery, as he aggressively avoids becoming embroiled in any daring quests or chosen one shenanigans even though the universe really seems to want him to do just that. Follow Sig as he chills with his friends and stays far, far away from the slightest whiff of adventure. And bakes. He also bakes.
Haunted House Flippers (Comedy, Horror): Hilarity and spooky shenanigans occur when Tom and Janet set out to renovate and resell an inherited home that turns out to be intensely haunted.
Fast Radio Burst! (Science Fiction): Contemporary suspense radio from quarantined New York.
Daedalus Compound (Surreal): Jesper Ikaros has found himself in a peculiar situation, he's trapped in a maze-like library with a book that contains his whole life story. Welcome to the Daedalus Compound. Where the past haunts you, the present hunts you, and the only way to escape is by getting to the center of the maze.
The Gaia Miracles (Science Fiction, Environment): Join me, Barry Orsen, a journalist with Nice Guise Media, as I investigate the Gaia Miracles more than a year after the catastrophic ending in Chicago and the disappearance of Elisa Garvey, my friend and the first reporter to witness one of the Miracles. With each interview, the established story unravels. Who is to blame? The industrial giant at the center of the Miracles, The Hydell Corporation, or the mysterious group who made them a target, Gaia Prime.
Forgive Me! (Comedy, Religion): Father Ben left his congregation in Binghamton, New York, in the cover of night for the smaller, quieter pastures of St. Patrick’s. As our new, young, and at times progressive priest begins to acquiesce to his new surroundings, he finds himself butting heads with the eccentric parishioners who come to him seeking solace and advice. Whether he’s trying to understand Old Margaret’s “usual” confession; parsing out how Tom can better help care for his wife’s pet pig, David; or getting to the bottom of the Christmas Eve Mass Incident, Forgive Me! explores the intertwined lives in Ben’s new community and the funny, sad, and sometimes painful experiences that come out of confession and the Catholic experience.
The Boston Project Podcast (Drama): The Boston Project is a new works program that supports the creation of new plays set in Boston, each of which explores what it means to live in this community, and taps into the many experiences and identities that make up life in the Hub.
Cinematic Sound Saturdays (Multiple Series, Genre Fiction): This series is a collection of audio dramas written, performed, produced, and recorded by students at Columbia College Chicago.

A week in Oklahoma on a joint $45k(ish)

Hi, everyone! This is my second Money Diary that I have posted in here and a pretty good amount has changed since my last one. Honestly after reading this one over I thought “shit, I sound so boring!” But there is a pandemic going on and I try really hard to stay home as much as I can.
My husband and I combine our finances and use YNAB for our budgeting. At the beginning of each month we both get $200 of spending money into our personal accounts to spend however we want to, I didn’t track his spending here because most of his money is spent on fast food and video games. Everything that I post comes out of my account or our household account.
Please note that any time I leave my house I wear a mask, I didn’t type this out but seriously I’m never without it. Even at work, if I leave my office I wear a mask.
Questions:
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent/guardian educate you about finances? Growing up it was just my mom and I, we did not talk about money and she did not educate me on anything finance related because honestly I don’t think she knew anything about money either.
Did you worry about money growing up? I didn’t worry about money because if there was ever a time that I needed something and my mom couldn’t afford it then my grandma was always willing to step in and help out. My mom did nails and thinking back on it now, there is no way that she made enough money to support us.
Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any kind of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it? My grandma really wanted me to go to college and I really tried but it wasn’t for me. I am really bad at math and could not pass a college math class to save my life so I took a semester off to figure out what I wanted to do and I never went back. I’ve worked full time ever since. The almost 2 years that I did take were paid for by a program called OK Go or something like that where I was given 2 years at a community college based on the school district that I graduated from. I would consider going back but I really don’t know how I would pass math.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a safety net? My mom got married to my step dad (who I refer to as my dad) when I was in 6th grade and our lives changed at that point. He is a veterinarian and has always been good with money so he supported mom and me for all of my middle/high school. I became financially responsible for myself around 21, I still lived with my parents but I was expected to pay part of the utilities, my phone bill, my car insurance, car payment and health insurance for myself.
Do you worry about money now? I don’t think I worry about money now because we have a good amount of savings built up. I do worry that when our daughter is born and it’s time for daycare we will struggle but I’m trying to build up a savings for that now.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? No. When my grandma died my mom, uncle and myself should have received something but her bitch of a wife somehow made sure that didn’t happen.
Assets and Debt:
Retirement balance: $6700 in a 401k with my job. My husband’s job recently set him up with an IRA and his balance is $1500. Equity: We purchased our home in 2019 but don’t have much equity built up yet. Checking account balance: $1500 is what I keep in our household checking account, everything else is transferred into our money market account. Savings account balance: $6800 - this is our savings, maternity leave fund and all of our sinking funds. Credit card debt: $630 on our Discover card. This was the purchase of a treadmill after we canceled our gym memberships because of COVID. It’s interest free until November 2021 and I plan to pay it off if we get another stimulus check.
Income:
My monthly take home: $1840, I’m paid every other week and this is after deductions for 401k, insurance (health, vision and dental for D and I) and my flex spending account. D’s monthly take home: $1900, he is also paid every other week and this is after his IRA contribution.
Expenses:
Mortgage: $880 - We live in a 3 bedroom, 1.5 bathroom home with a nice backyard for the dog. ATT phones/internet/TV: $207 for our phones, internet and TV. We only got a TV package this year and I don’t hate having it but I’m not sure if it’s worth it. We get HBO Max included for free. Gas: $25-$100 depending on the season. I make sure that we always have $100 available just in case. Electric: $60-$150 depending on the season. I always make sure we have $150 available just in case. Watetrash: $85 Car Insurance: $233, I got into a car accident in December last year and it went up by like $70. I’m hoping that it goes down soon. Life Insurance: $50 combined for term life on myself and D Discover Card: $35 is the minimum but I usually pay more. Subscriptions (Disney+, Apple storage/music, Netflix): $40 for all of the things. We let my parents use our Hulu and Netflix log in if they want to but I don’t think they do. We debated canceling Netflix but I use it more than the others so we just downgraded to the cheaper plan. Groceries: I try to keep this around $75 a week. We recently started Imperfect Foods so we will get produce shipped to us for like $20 a week and I’m hoping that will keep me out of the grocery store.
Annual Expenses: YNAB: $80 Amazon Prime: $120 Jewelry Insurance: $60
The diary:
Day 1-Sunday
4 am: My husband, D, wakes up at this ridiculous hour and of course he is loud so it wakes me up. I hear him pour some food for the dog but she isn’t ready to eat so she hops into bed with me and goes back to sleep. Toss and turn for about 20 minutes and finally fall back asleep.
8:15 am: Wake up part 2. This seems like a much more appropriate hour. I’m pretty much immediately hungry so I head into the kitchen and I really want some biscuits and gravy but we don’t have anything that I need to make that so instead I opt for my leftover burger that I didn’t finish yesterday. Not the best meal ever but it does the trick. Call my mom to tell her that the pack and play she ordered was delivered and that we are going to start putting it together. I am currently about 17 weeks pregnant with my mom’s first grandchild and she is beyond excited. I am excited too but she takes the cake for sure. After I hang up I get sucked into TikTok for like 30 minutes and right as I feel my brain start turning to mush I decide to close the app and move on to more productive things like making a grocery list. Remember that I need to take my prenatal and Zoloft. I have struggled with anxiety for a long time and this summer it got pretty intense so my doctor prescribed me Zoloft, I guess it’s working but I still get anxiety from time to time.
11 am: Ask my husband D if he wants to go with me to Wal-Mart to get groceries. Normally I do a pick up order but the things that I added to the app didn’t meet the $35 minimum. We head to a different Wal-Mart than normal because the one closest to us didn’t have Bar Keeper’s Friend and I heard that using that in my fiberglass bathtub will clean it better than anything I’ve found. Normally we listen to some sort of true crime podcast in my car but I’m so caught up on everything that I’ve decided to listen to audio books for a while, currently I’m listening to Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. Once we get to the store I send D on a mission to get a few things off the list while I get the rest, divide and conquer has been the best strategy for us to get our stuff and not commit murder while we are there. We meet back at the produce area and walk over to the self-checkout. I’m annoyed because we ended up spending enough to have placed a pick up order and not have to have gone in the store but oh well, I guess. The total was $41.14 and we got almond milk, chocolate almond milk, 2 pounds of shredded cheese, 2 bags of salad, face wash, canned corn, canned green beans, Bar Keeper’s Friend, salsa and a sticky bug trap thing to go under our kitchen sink. On our way home I ask D to drive me past a day care that is in the area so that I can look at it as a possible option in the future, it looks nice and will definitely be on the list of places that I want to tour. ($41.14)
1 pm: I am so bored I could cry. I’ve done laundry and I need to clean up the house but I have zero motivation to do anything. I try scrolling TikTok again but that doesn’t do it for me, decide to lay down with the dog and read a book for a little bit. This could be bad because normally when I lay down I end up falling asleep and then I can’t sleep at night. I’m reading a book called The Family which is about a cult type situation and I’m not entirely sold on it yet. I love all things cult-y so I thought this would be a good one to try on Kindle Unlimited so fingers crossed that it gets better. Does anyone else have Kindle Unlimited? I paid for 6 months of it a couple of months ago and have barely used it because it seems like anything that I want to read they don’t have and that bugs me. Probably won’t renew when it comes time. Good news, I didn’t fall asleep! I decide that taking a shower sounds like a good idea, it’s not a hair washing day for me so I’m in and out fairly quickly. Skin care today consists of Neutrogena Hydro Boost cleanser and once I’m out of the shower I use some moisturizer that I bought from an old friend who is sucked into the MLM, Perfectly Posh.
5 pm: I really don’t want to cook dinner tonight and that I could really go for Mexican food completely based on the fact that refried beans sound so good. I ask D if he is down for that and he says yes. We order to go from a place up the street: I get a burrito dinner and D gets a combo meal with 3 enchiladas, a tamale and 2 tacos ($40 after tip). D goes to pick up dinner and I give the dog her dinner plus her 2 evening fish oil tablets, she has really dry skin and itches constantly so the vet (AKA my dad) told me to start her on fish oil with breakfast and dinner. We settle in to watch The Santa Clause while we eat. We also talk about Christmas being this week and should I make a special meal on Christmas Eve, we aren’t big on holidays in my family and with everyone staying at their own houses this year I’d honestly rather order a pizza but we have plenty of food in the freezer that I feel like I should whip up a good meal.
9 pm: After the movie we got sucked in to watching Deliciousness on MTV and snuggling with the dog, I am now ready to go to bed and read my book. Put the dog out for one final bathroom break before bed and then we go lay down, she is snoring almost immediately which I’m jealous of because I never sleep well. I read my book until about 10 and then toss and turn until I finally pass out.
Day 2- Monday
6 am: My alarm goes off and I just don’t want to deal with it so I lay in bed until 6:30. D already fed the dog before he left for work (he works 6-2:30) so she is back in bed with me. I tell her good morning and pet her for a few minutes before I absolutely have to get ready for work. First things first, I go start my car. It’s 37 degrees outside and I don’t handle cold very well so I prefer my car to be nice and toasty when I get in. Once inside I brush my teeth and pick out my clothes. Today I’m wearing some black pants and a gray sweater all from Old Navy. I don’t wear makeup very often and honestly I almost never wear it to work so my morning routine is quicker than most. Throw together some yogurt and frozen berries into one container and granola into another, mix up a protein shake with my chocolate almond milk and Orgain protein powder and then grab my leftovers from dinner last night to take to work with me. I also always take a Blender Bottle with water and Crystal Light with me, I really need to drink more water but my go to Crystal Light is the strawberry flavored one and it has 60 mg of caffeine per stick so I try to limit how many I have in a day, I think some pregnant people still consume caffeine like normal but I’m on the fence about it.
8 am: At work and ready to get the day going. I work in the customer service department of a small bank. I take a lot of phone calls from people wanting to know their account balances, people who forget their password to the website and pretty much anything else you would call the bank about. In addition to that kind of stuff I also have a set of daily tasks to complete which include things like balancing the cash reports for all the branches, monitoring new accounts for suspicious activity, approving transactions over $5000, monitoring debit card fraud and approving/denying mobile deposits. I’ve been with my current bank since 2017 and I started out as a teller supervisor where I worked M-F 11:30-6:30 and Saturdays from 9-1, a couple of months ago I transferred to my new department and I’m definitely enjoying it more. The hours here are M-F 8-5 and no weekends. Last week we had 5 employees who work at my location that were on the last leg of their COVID time off after having tested positive the week before and today everyone is back and everything is back to normal for the most part. Except for the fact that I’m in an isolation office away from everyone because I’m pregnant and they want to keep me safe which is nice. I start out my day by checking on mobile deposits, this morning there are 43 which is pretty normal for a Monday. Then I move on to my suspicious activity monitoring and nothing looks suspicious so I’m done with that. The phones start ringing off the hook at 9 am and I can tell it’s going to be a long day. Put in an Air Pod and listen to Harry Potter as I’m able.
12:45 pm: On my lunch break for another 15 minutes. Looking over my budget in YNAB and making some plans for the New Year. I’ve almost got 2 months of income saved up for maternity leave in May, I plan to take more than 2 months but I will have 2 months paid between my sick time and vacation time so I’ll have to go thru that before I use the money that I’ve got saved up. I text back and forth with my mom about baby names because I’m convinced that my grandma is sending me messages from the grave, LOL but I’m serious. D and I were convinced that we were going to have a boy so we had a couple of boy names that we loved and only one girl name because we weren’t going to need it. Well, we were wrong and now D has informed me that he doesn’t really love the name that we have picked out. I was really surprised because when I put it on the list he had no complaints… Turns out a friend of Ds from high school, who he doesn’t talk to anymore, has a daughter that is like 7 with the same name that I love and that means that D is on the fence about it. We are now looking at other options but I think that we are going to wait til she comes out to make the final decision.
2:20 pm: Caught up on my work for the day so now I’m reading Canadian money diaries because I haven’t read any of these and I’m all caught up on the ones from the US. I have a headache and really wish that I had taken a nap on my lunch break. I also pay the balance on my Apple card ($161.67). D didn’t notice an email come thru last week that said our Butcher Box was shipping so we didn’t postpone the shipment. We definitely don’t need the meat because we bought a quarter of a cow last month but Butcher Box couldn’t do anything about it so we are stuck with the extra meat. I also make a payment to my Chase credit card that I use to pay bills. I saw that our internet bill paid last week so I send that over ($50). I see an email that our Imperfect Foods (Imperfect Produce?) box has been charged ($18.30) this is our first box and I’m hoping we like it. I had a $10 off for using someone’s code and they’re sending me between 11-13 pounds of produce so I feel like it’s a good deal, our shipment comes tomorrow and we will get 1 lb carrots, 1 bundle of green onions, 3 limes, 1 lb sweet potatoes, 1 lb potatoes, 2 oranges, 1 onion (?), ½ pound green beans, 3 apples, ½ pound jalapenos, 2 bell peppers, 2 cucumbers and 2 avocados… I also added 2 southwest chipotle nourish bowls because they sound bomb. ($229.97)
4 pm: Text back and forth with D about dinner for tonight. He is going to make some steaks and green beans and maybe some TJ’s sweet potato gnocchi. I spend the last hour of work alternating between reading money diaries and checking on my mobile deposits. I keep forgetting that Christmas is this week which is nice because on Thursday (Christmas Eve) the bank closes at 1. I’m bummed that I’m not going to get to see my family this year but with COVID happening I’m just not willing to chance getting sick or even worse taking cooties to my parents and getting them sick. I’m sure I’ll FaceTime my mom a bunch while I’m cooking or something because I always do, that’s just how we do things since the pandemic started.
8 pm: Got home from work and went a little wild on some leftover chips and tortillas and queso that were left over from last night so I’m not hungry when D makes steaks, I’ll have mine tomorrow. I walk on the treadmill for 30 minutes while watching budgeting videos on YouTube. I let D know that instead of making a pie for Christmas Eve I’m going to make sugar cookies with my grandma’s recipe and then we will decorate them with homemade frosting. This is a tradition that my grandma and I had and I want to make sure that it keeps going. I wish that I could pick up my little cousin and bring him over to make them too but I don’t trust his family’s COVID prevention and I can’t risk getting sick. In bed before 9 reading my book and snuggling the dog.
Day 3-Tuesday
6:30 am: Out of bed and remember that I need to get gas so I’m leaving a little earlier today. Snuggle with my dog for a few minutes and tell her how much I love her and then force myself to get ready. Brush my teeth and head to the kitchen to throw together some yogurt and berries to take to work. I didn’t drink my shake from yesterday so that is still in the fridge at work. Time to head out, say bye to the dog and head out to my (very cold) car. Listening to Harry Potter again on the way to work and I decide to stop at Dunkin to get a breakfast sandwich and a hot chocolate ($5.74). Yes I packed berries and yogurt but that is usually my afternoon snack to give me a little energy boost when I start to crash. Stop at OnCue for gas ($21.29) and then on to work. ($27.03)
11 am: Someone in my department is out on vacation the rest of the week so not only do I get to take over her daily tasks but I get to take on her lunch break which is 11 am. I’ve been pretty busy this morning so I didn’t have a chance to eat my sandwich so I heat that up for lunch but only manage half. I had weight loss surgery 2 years ago so my portions are pretty small compared to what other people eat and certain carbs don’t sit well in my stomach so I fill up faster – this is the first time I’ve had a bagel in about 2 years and now I know that I probably won’t have another one because my stomach hurts pretty bad after eating it. I watch UnReal on Hulu and text back and forth with a friend about a budget spreadsheet that I want but don’t want to pay for because I feel like if I did some googling I could learn the formula to make a spreadsheet do what this one does. Basically this lady made a budget spreadsheet and she plugs in her total income and then all of her categories and when she plugs in the category totals it tells her what percent of her income she is putting towards that category. Do I need that? No. Would I use it? Maybe. Am I going to buy it? No…?
3 pm: Listening to Harry Potter and inputting a bunch of wires. Take a minute to call D, his check engine light has been on for about a week and we are trying to exhaust all the options before we take his truck to the shop. I spoke to the garage that we take it to and George told me that we need to make sure that his gas cap is secure because there could be air going into the gas tank and that will cause the code that D got when he took it to Autozone last week. We had already ordered a gas cap but it didn’t seem to fit correctly so D is going to go to O’Reillys to see if someone there can help him out (O’Reillys people seem to be friendlier than the people at Autozone). Update: the gas cap that we ordered must fit better than I thought because as soon as he got to O’Reillys and took it off to show the people and then put it back on the engine light went off.
4:30 pm: Work is slowing down and I’m ready for a snack, head to the kitchen for my yogurt and berries. Once I’m caught up on my mobile deposit approvals I try to recreate the spreadsheet that I was obsessed with earlier today, I haven’t looked at the formulas yet but hopefully it works out.
9 pm: D gives me the option of watching Friday After Next or Lethal Weapon (weird options, I know) and I choose Lethal Weapon. He considers this a Christmas movie which I find interesting. After eating dinner (leftovers) and watching the ¾ of the movie I look over and see that D has passed out on the couch. I holler at him to wake up and tell him that I’m picking what we watch for the next 2 nights and he just shrugs. We have very different taste in movies and shows so it takes FOREVER for us to decide on something to watch when we are sharing the TV. Take a shower and the dog and I head to bed, watch YouTube and fall asleep around 10.
Day 4 – Wednesday
6 am: Alarm goes off but I’ve been up for about 30 minutes so I lay in bed and scroll TikTok for about 30 minutes. When I’m over TikTok I roll to the other side of my bed to snuggle with the dog and tell her how much I’m going to miss her today. She just looks at me and lays her head back down so I don’t think she feels the same. Fix some berries and yogurt to take to work, get dressed and head out the door. Turn on Harry Potter and make a mental to do list of things that I’d like to get done over the weekend and wonder how I’m going to keep D on track with this list.
9 am: All done with Harry Potter but super behind on work, how is that possible it’s only been an hour? It seems like every time I get on a roll then someone calls with an issue or someone brings me wires to input. Wednesday is always really busy with wires for some reason so I should have been expecting this but I wasn’t. When I have a second I grab my yogurt and berries and top with granola and eat as I go. Send a message to one of my coworkers and ask her if she would mind taking one of my branches large item reports and she said she would be happy too because she is caught up for the moment. Bless her.
6 pm: This day was wild and I’m so happy to be home. Walk on the treadmill for 30 minutes and then we have dinner. We decided to have French’s crispy onion chicken and salad. Normally this is one of my favorite meals but apparently chicken grosses me out these days. Luckily D will eat all of it (in one sitting) so we don’t have any leftovers. I watch an episode of Chopped and D passes out on the couch at 8, I ask him if he wants to go to bed and he says it is too early but then he proceeds to fall asleep again.
8:30 pm: D has fallen asleep again. I wake him up and tell him that he might think it’s too early to go to bed but he’s already passed out so he might as well go to the bedroom. I watch an episode of 16 & Pregnant before I head to bed. With D and the dog in bed there is very little room for me but I make it work because I don’t want to disturb them. Pass out by 10.
Day 5- Thursday (Christmas Eve)
6:30 am: Not feelin’ it today, yall. I woke up at 3 with the worst heartburn and I could not fall back asleep until about 5. The only thing keeping me going is the fact that the bank closes at 1 today. Get up, start my car and get ready for work. I sit on the bed and explain to the dog that I will be getting off work early, going to the store and then I will be home probably before 3 and then we can play outside and take a nap…. She does not care.
9 am: Quick break from work to budget my paycheck in YNAB. We are starting a new budget in January and I’m beyond excited, I’m so lame.
1 pm: Work is over, get me out of here. I have to stop on my way home and get groceries so I’m heading to Winco because I feel like it will be less busy than Wal-Mart. Get my list pulled up on my phone and head into the store. I get sausage, bacon, heavy cream, powdered sugar, bisquick, ranch seasoning, pink salt, hot chocolate, food coloring, crackers, greek yogurt, black eyed peas, tortillas and milk ($41.18). Get home by 2 pm. ($41.18)
3 pm: Got a text from my mom’s best friend that they put some Christmas gifts on our porch. D got a new Ugg blanket (didn’t even know these existed) and a stocking full of candy, I got a Google Nest thermostat and a stocking full of candy. They also gave us a card with a $100 bill in it so that’s cool. We got them gifts earlier this month which we already dropped off on their porch last week, it was a bottle of gin from a local place and a bag of coffee. Place an online order for Michael’s for some cookie cutters and some books of planner stickers and go pick them up before they close. ($44.01).
10 pm: Head to bed after watching Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, I’d tell you what we had for dinner but I legit cannot remember.
Day 6- Friday (Christmas)
7:30 am- D got up at 6 to take a gift over to his parent’s house to put on their porch. His mom is taking it really hard that we aren’t spending Christmas with them so we decided to put together a care package and drop it off for them - it has some assorted cheeses, salami, crackers and wine. Once he gets home I get up and start making breakfast which is biscuits and sausage gravy. Then we open presents. We don’t really do gifts, normally we will give each other a gift card to somewhere but this year we both opted to buy the other something. D got me a new phone case with a picture from Sister Act on it - I’m obsessed with Sister Act so this was a great gift. I got him a nose hair trimmer because that is what he said he wanted. Lol.
1 pm- After diddling around the house all morning I’m bored and decide that I want to get out of the house. I suggest to D that we take the dog to the dog park and he says okay. We drive to one that’s about 20 minutes away and it was a waste of time, she doesn’t want to play or do anything. D and I throw a ball back and forth for about 15 minutes before we decide to head out.
7 pm- The rest of the day is a blur to me, we hung out at home and watched YouTube or whatever we could find on TV. At some point I ordered a hot sauce making kit for my dad on Amazon. ($54.24) D says that he is going to make dinner because he is hungry… this was a bad idea. He is higher than giraffe balls and he messes up the recipe a couple of times but luckily it turns out okay. I don’t know if this is considered a casserole but that is what I call it when I talk about it… it’s basically ground beef, heavy cream, beef broth, cream cheese, a can of corn and a can of green beans topped with cheese and baked. In bed and reading around 9, asleep by 10. ($54.24)
Day 7- Saturday
8:30 am- Up and making some more biscuits to go with our leftover sausage gravy from yesterday. I have big plans today of cleaning the whole house. I made a list of everything that needs to get done and after breakfast we are going to start.
12pm- All done with cleaning. The only room that we skipped (for now) is the kitchen because we are going to make cookies later and I don’t want to do a deep clean just to mess it all up in a few hours. That probably sounds silly but oh well. D’s parents gave us a check for $200 for Christmas so I want to take that to the bank to get it deposited and I’m hungry so I tell D if he rides with me to the bank that I’ll buy him a burger for lunch. After we make our deposit we go to Johnnie’s (I think this is a somewhat local place and it’s not anything special but I think the cheese they use is the best thing on the planet) I order a burger with cheese, mayo, ketchup and pickles with an order of crispy fries and D gets a double theta cheeseburger with onion rings ($27 after tip). On the way home I decide that I want to light a fire in our fireplace and we are out of wood so we run into Ace Hardware and get some. I was just going to get one but then I found a coupon for $5 off in my purse so I got 2 bundles- this won’t last us long but oh well, I need to do some research of where I can buy a whole rick of wood ($7.57). Home, fed and now watching a Sex and the City marathon. ($34.57)
6 pm- D comes in and reminds me that we were going to make cookies. My grandma passed away in September and we always made her sugar cookies at Christmastime and my mom and sometimes my brother would go to her house and spend time decorating (and eating) them. My mom sent me the recipe for her cookies and frosting so I’m excited to do it. I don’t remember how many cookies the recipe makes but I was not prepared for how many there are, at least 25 cookies from one batch of dough. While the cookies are cooling we eat leftover casserole and watch Little on HBO- I thought this movie was cute and I loved the outfits. When it’s time to decorate the cookies I learn that D doesn’t have the patience for this and I don’t think he ever decorated cookies because he just slathers one color icing on a cookie and calls it good while I’m over here creating an artistic masterpiece on mine (not really but I use a lot of colors and try to make designs). The cookies turn out good for my first time making them without grandma’s help and I’m glad we did it.
9 pm- Make plans for tomorrow which consist of going to Sam’s for toilet paper and laundry detergent, making an Amazon return to Kohl’s and meal prepping. Head to bed and read my book for like 15 minutes before I pass out.
Weekly Total: $472.14
Groceries: $127.62 Household: $7.57 Gifts: $54.24 Fun: $49.75 Gas: $21.29 Debt payment: $211.67
Reflections:
This was not an entirely normal week in our house, I don’t usually have to pay $211.67 to debt payments. Other than my Discover card I don’t carry a balance on anything so as soon as I see that a bill paid onto a credit card then I pay it off. My grocery spending seems high but technically I did 2 weeks worth of shopping in this diary so I’m not mad about it.

I am 38 years old, make $57,000, live in New Orleans, LA, and work as an assistant professor.

(Warning: this is boooooooooring. You'll see a lot more of my boring quarantine routine than any money I spend.)
Section One: Assets and Debt
Retirement Balance (and how you got there) - $230,000. I’ve been saving for retirement since I got my first post-college job at 21, so I have several 401(k)s, 403(b)s, and a Roth IRA.
Savings account balance - $26,000
Checking account balance - $2500
Credit card debt (and how you accumulated it) – $0. I have never carried any credit card debt, and I know I’m lucky that I never had to.
Student loan debt (for what degree) - $0. I had $61,000 total in student loan debt from undergrad and grad school, but I used the snowball method to pay off my undergrad loans when I was 28, and (I kid you not) won enough money on a game show to pay off my grad school loans a few years later.
Section Two: Income
Income Progression: I've been working in higher education for 13 years, and my starting salary was $38,000. When I switched jobs two years ago, it got bumped up to $45,000. I started out after college working as a microbiology laboratory technician making around $34,000 a year, but started teaching at the college level after I got my master’s degree because I was tired of laboratory work.
Main Job Monthly Take Home:
$2274. I make a little extra each month on top of my base salary because I teach one overload class every semester.
Deductions:
Health Insurance - $158
Dental Insurance - $4
403(b) contribution - $519 (this is 15% of my pre-tax income; my job matches 6%)
Federal w/h - $262
OASDI - $214
Medicare - $50
Louisiana w/h - $96
Side Gig Monthly Take Home
I have a side gig teaching online ESL classes with a Chinese company. My pre-tax take-home income from that job varies between $600-1100 per month, depending on how many slots I open on my schedule and how many parents book my classes. I usually average around $850 per month pre-tax. I haven’t had to file taxes yet on this income because I’ve only been doing it since the beginning of the year, but the company advises that you reserve 30% of your pre-tax income for taxes. That would leave me with around $600 post-tax per month.
Section Three: Expenses
Housing expenses - I have no housing costs, because my boyfriend paid cash for a Katrina-flooded house in 2006 and had fixed it up by the time I moved in with him in 2018. He pays the property taxes and homeowners insurance, and I don’t know how much they are.
Retirement contribution – I’ve already contributed the full amount for my Roth IRA this year, but it averages $500 a month.
Savings contribution – I have an online high-yield savings account and since the pandemic started, I’ve been contributing $2000 per month because I’m not spending a lot of money right now.
Investment contribution – I don’t have a separate investment account, only my retirement accounts.
Debt payments – None.
Donations – this makes me feel terrible, but I’m not donating any of my money right now. My whole industry is on shaky ground right now and I teach at a college with a small enrollment, so I’m trying to save as much as I can in case I get laid off next year, due to lower enrollment because of the pandemic. I do contribute a few cans of food and some toiletries every month to our neighborhood Little Free Pantry.
Electric – my boyfriend pays this, and I don’t know how much it usually is.
Wi-Fi/Cable/Landline - $65 for Internet. We don’t have cable or a landline.
Cellphone - $43
Subscriptions – None.
Gym membership – None. I take walks around my neighborhood instead.
Pet expenses – My boyfriend and I split pet expenses for our three cats. I usually spend around $60 per month on food, medication for our cat who has skin allergies, and flea treatments.
Car payment / insurance – I paid cash for my car last year so I don’t have a car payment, and my car insurance is around $80 per month.
Paid hobbies – I love to make handicrafts, and I spend around $20 per month on cross-stitch/knitting/macramé/beading supplies.
Gas - $10 a month. I barely leave the house these days due to the pandemic, so I’m spending a lot less on gas right now.
Long-term disability insurance - $61. I had a health scare in my early 30s where I developed vestibular neuritis, a mild form of vertigo, for almost two years after a nasty upper respiratory infection. I was lucky that I was never sick enough to have to stop working, but I’ve paid for disability insurance ever since I recovered, because I know how quickly sickness and accidents can happen. I have short-term disability insurance, life insurance, and hospitalization insurance free through my work, so I don’t pay for separate policies for those.
Food - $600/month. I paid $90 for a yearly Shipt subscription when the pandemic started, because my boyfriend is diabetic and I’d never forgive myself if I spread the virus to him. I really appreciate our delivery guy doing this for us and I tip him well! I cook most of our meals and pay for take-out once or twice a month.
WateTrash - $100/month. Our local water utility is a hot mess and our usage is rarely calculated correctly, but this is the average.
Wednesday
5:30 – I wake up to feed my cats and prepare for my four ESL classes this morning.
6:00 – I teach a class to one of my favorite students, a thirteen-year-old girl who loves telling me about her pet birds and the fun things she and her friends do at school.
6:30 – I teach a class to a twelve-year-old boy who is a VERY good student and laughs at all my stupid jokes. He’s one of my favorites too.
7:00 – I teach a class to an eight-year-old girl who used to be one of my favorites, but she’s been really bored with the material lately and has been misbehaving a bit on camera. Luckily today she’s fairly well-behaved today and participates for the most part.
7:30 – I teach a class to my absolute favorite student, a twelve-year old who speaks great English and thinks I hung the moon for some reason. My face hurts every time I end class because I smile so much when I teach her!
8:00 – I eat breakfast: cereal with almond milk, cottage cheese, a clementine, a can of V8, and coffee.
9:00 – It’s raining pretty hard today so I stay inside and snuggle my most affectionate cat while I waste time on my phone. I tidy up the house and make the beds after my cat has had enough of me.
11:00 – I make lunch. I eat leftover homemade guacamole with Costco tortilla chips, leftover Korean-style ground beef over rice with some sriracha on top, and a bottle of Costco kombucha to drink.
12:00 – I teach my first college class of the day via Zoom. The enrollment is officially 17 students, but I don’t require that they attend the Zoom class because everything is basically on fire right now, and a lot of students are working and/or helping their kids with online school. I usually have a handful of students show up, and I record the class and post it online for anyone who can’t make it to class. Today I only have two students, but they’re great and class goes quickly. I remind them about their chapter assignments that are due on Monday evening.
1:30 – I teach my second college class via Zoom. This class is a smaller 400-level class and the students ALWAYS attend unless there’s an emergency. They’re a terrific group of students, and this class is on the subject that I specialized in for my master’s degree, so I always have good stories and terrible jokes to tell about the material. It’s a lot of fun for me to talk about! My students have an online exam next Monday, so I prep them for that as well and answer their questions.
3:00 – I wait for the Zoom classes to convert to .mp4 files and post them on our classes’ Canvas websites (this is the online learning management system that my school uses).
3:30 – Our municipal recycling company doesn’t accept glass in their bins, so I drive our empty glass bottles to a local nonprofit’s weekly glass collection (they crush it and make sand for coastal restoration – pretty cool). I also take a book back to the neighborhood library. Last month I got two traffic tickets in school zones while I was making this same run and had to pay $220, so I drive veeeerrryyyy slowly today and really watch for the school zone signs.
5:00 – I eat dinner: leftover meatloaf and mashed potatoes from last night. My boyfriend usually doesn’t like to eat leftovers so it’s ALL FOR ME, yum!
6:00 – My boyfriend comes home from work and just grabs a snack because he ate a big lunch at work.
7:00 – We cuddle on the couch and watch a movie together.
9:00 – I read the news on my phone before I zonk out around 9:30 pm.
Daily expenses: $0
Thursday
5:30 – I wake up to feed my cats and teach one ESL class to an absolutely adorable five-year-old girl.
6:30 – I wake up my boyfriend for work - he’s an essential worker in the shipping industry and has had to go to work through the whole pandemic. I eat the same breakfast as yesterday: cereal with almond milk, cottage cheese, a clementine, a can of V8, and coffee.
8:00 – I take a long walk around our neighborhood and nerd out at the beautiful architecture of the houses on a ritzy street near my not-so-ritzy street. I have a deep love of architecture and design, and am lucky to live in one of the most beautiful and unique cities in the US (and, I think, the world). Living in New Orleans is a treat for all of the senses.
10:00 – I tidy up the house, make the beds, and do my laundry. I’m fussy about the detergent and washing requirements for my clothes, so I always do my laundry and my boyfriend’s laundry separately.
11:30 – I eat lunch: a ham and turkey sandwich, a piece of cheese from Costco, and a bottle of kombucha.
12:00 – I have online office hours via Zoom for three hours. No one ever shows up, so I use the time to grade assignments and answer e-mails. I got a few new advisees this semester, so I’m helping them pick their classes for the upcoming spring and summer semesters.
3:30 – I char corn tortillas and cook turkey taco meat for dinner.
4:00 – The mail comes and I get a package – a shirt I ordered from Poshmark last week. I discovered Poshmark last year and I absolutely love it! I don’t buy clothes from there very often, but if I do it’s usually not too much, maybe $25 at a time. This particular shirt cost $21 but retails at $60, so I got a great deal for a barely-used piece of clothing.
4:30 – My boyfriend hasn’t come home from work yet and I’m hungry, so I make myself dinner: four turkey tacos.
5:30 – My boyfriend comes home from work and makes himself nachos with the taco meat, and we sit at the dinner table and talk about our day.
6:00 – I took part in a COVID vaccine study two months ago and I have to log my symptoms twice a week in a study app, so the researchers can monitor if there’s a difference in COVID rates between people who got the experimental vaccine and people who received a placebo. I’ve been just fine for the past few days, so I log that in the app.
6:30 – I read a book I picked up from our neighborhood Little Free Library until bedtime.
9:00 – Bedtime! One of our cats comes in to get nighttime scritches, and my boyfriend crawls in a bit later when he finishes the movie he was watching.
Daily expenses: $0
Friday
5:30 – My alarm goes off, I feed my cats, and I check my phone and see that my first ESL student of the day cancelled today’s class, but I still get paid because they cancelled less than 24 hours before class. He’s a really nice little boy and I enjoy teaching him, but I’ll take it!
6:00 – I wake up my boyfriend and make the same breakfast as yesterday: cereal with almond milk, cottage cheese, a clementine, a can of V8, and coffee. I also eat a few pieces of turkey sausage because I’m a little hungrier than usual this morning and need the protein.
6:30- I teach my second ESL class to a twelve-year-old kid who is always tired and kind of lazy, but speaks good English and usually does a pretty good job in class.
9:00 – I do my boyfriend’s laundry, make the beds, and tidy up and sweep the house. How do we have so much HAIR on the floor? Oh, right, three cats and a long-haired human.
11:30 – I fix a snack plate for lunch that has almonds, cheese, hummus, crackers, and a clementine on it, and I have kombucha to drink.
12:00 – I attend a college department meeting via Zoom. It’s pretty boring, but it’s nice to see everyone’s faces again.
12:30 – During my meeting, I sneak online and buy a 2021 refill for my Day-Timer planner. I’m old school and still use a paper planner, and I’ve used the same kind since 2000, when I was in college! If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it… Cost = $25.93
1:00 – I attend a meeting for professors who have dual enrollees (high school students who are taking classes with us for college credit) via Zoom. The students are doing very well in spite of COVID, which really cheers me up to hear.
3:30 – I eat a homemade peach yogurt popsicle for a snack. Homemade popsicles have been a new obsession during quarantine, and this is one of my favorites – it’s just peach preserves mixed with Greek yogurt and a little water.
5:30 – I make leftover turkey tacos for dinner and eat a piece of leftover Halloween candy for dessert.
8:00 – I teach another ESL class (I teach in the evenings on Fridays and Saturdays). The little girl is… something else, but she kisses the camera when I tell her good-bye, which is adorable.
8:30 – I read some of my book and conk out around 9:30.
Daily expenses: $25.93
Saturday
5:30 – I wake up to feed my cats and prepare for an ESL class.
6:00 – I teach a class to a really fun and smart eight-year-old boy. His mom has booked me for more classes in the coming weeks, yay!
6:30 – I eat pretty much the same breakfast as before: cereal with almond milk, cottage cheese, a clementine, and coffee. I’m so predictable.
10:00 – My boyfriend and I go to a socially-distanced used book sale that we sometimes visit on Saturdays. I pick out three books to send to my parents, who are trying to stay sane in virus-infested Michigan right now. My boyfriend pays for them and buys a few DVDs for himself too.
11:00 – We get take-out lunch from a local cheese shop. My boyfriend pays for this as well – he gets a turkey sandwich and I get a salad and a cheese plate.
1:00 – I’m running low on hydrocolloid patches for pimples, so I go to the Walgreens website and order three packs of them (there’s a buy-two-get-one-free sale), along with tampons, pads, rosehip oil for my rosacea, and a honey shampoo to try out on my dry, wavy hair. Cost = $42.60
1:30 – About once a month I upload a bunch of pictures of me, my boyfriend, and our cats to my Snapfish account and send my parents the prints. They don’t use social media or smartphones, so this is an easy way to show them what’s going on in our lives. (Admittedly, not much these days.) Cost = $3.39
2:30 – I’ve been wanting a linen duvet cover for the longest time, and Ikea FINALLY has the one I want in stock. I buy one along with the lightest king-sized down comforter they offer, and some cooking tools for our upcoming Thanksgiving dinner as well. This will be the first Thanksgiving dinner I’ve ever cooked, and I want it to turn out well for the two of us! Cost = $256.53
2:45 – I got paid yesterday, so I transfer $1000 into my online high-yield savings account. It hasn’t been yielding a whole lot this year since interest rates were cut, but I’ll take what I can get at this point.
3:30 – My other shirt from Poshmark arrived that I ordered last week! Now I’m set for fall and don’t have to buy any more clothes for a while.
4:00 – I do a little college schoolwork online – grading and doing prep work for a new course I’m developing and will be teaching in the spring. First off I have to figure out what assessments to give the students, and then I’ll start writing the PowerPoints and quizzes/exams. I’m co-teaching it with a colleague, so I send her an e-mail as well about it.
5:30 – I’m still pretty full from lunch so I just eat some crackers and hummus and a clementine for dinner, plus kombucha to drink.
6:30 – I teach three ESL classes back-to-back to three regular students who always book classes on Saturday night. My butt is sore by the end of it!
8:00 – Bedtime, yay! I have to get up really early tomorrow for more ESL classes.
Daily expenses: $302.52
Sunday
4:30 – This is waaaay too early to be up. I only have to get up so early because of the time change, and I have three regular ESL students who have been booking the same timeslots every Sunday for months. At least they’re all good kids.
5:00 – I teach my most faithful regular student, a nine-year-old girl who’s been taking my classes the whole year.
6:00 – One of my students canceled and I get paid anyway! This is the second time this week it’s happened, which is pretty rare. I go back to bed and read for a half hour instead.
6:30 – I teach a seven-year-old girl who is more interested in playing with toys at her desk than participating, but hey, I get paid either way!
7:00 – Same breakfast: cereal with almond milk, cottage cheese, a clementine, and coffee. Boooooring.
10:00 – I grade assignments for my online college courses – my students turn them in on Saturday, so I usually take a big chunk of time on Sunday morning/afternoon to grade them all at once.
12:00 – I eat the rest of the cheese plate from yesterday for lunch with some crackers and kombucha.
12:30 – I review my notes for tomorrow’s college class. Luckily I’m only teaching one class tomorrow because of the online exam in my second class.
2:30 – I haven’t started a craft project in the past few weeks, so I start a HUGE Frank Lloyd Wright cross-stitch that I’d like to frame and put up in our entryway if it turns out nicely. I have all the supplies already, but later on I may have to buy some more embroidery floss. I watch Lucy Worsley English history documentaries on YouTube as I stitch, because, well, I’m a nerd.
5:00 – I eat the rest of the leftover turkey tacos and have a can of La Croix with them.
6:00 – I tuck in early and read the news on my phone for a couple hours before conking out around 8:30. Good night!
Daily expenses: $0
Monday
5:30 – I wake up to feed the cats and teach two ESL classes.
6:00 – My first ESL class has some technical problems but we manage to get everything completed. I’ve been noticing a few problems crop up here and there with the desktop app I use and wonder if the company should update its software.
6:30 – My second ESL class is with a total spaz of a five-year-old boy who keeps getting up and running around the room because he’s so excited. Luckily his mom is there to rein him in and help him repeat the new vocabulary.
7:00 – I have to clean up cat barf because one of my cats yacked in the hallway. I think I know which one it is because he hangs out at the other end of the hallway watching me clean up the whole time! Gross.
7:30 – I eat breakfast: same as yesterday, but with turkey bacon added. This is what passes for excitement in my life these days.
8:00 – I order a Shipt grocery delivery. Since quarantine started in March, I have this down to a science and place two big orders a month, one during the first week of the month and the other during the third week of the month. I usually get the same shopper every time and he knows my substitutions by now, and all in all it’s been a good experience. I order a little more food than usual this time because I’m stocking up for Thanksgiving next week, and I order a big box of canned cat food as well. Cost = $198.15
10:30 – My Shipt order arrives and I hurry to put everything away.
11:30 – Lunchtime! I make a snack plate with salami, cheese, a clementine, and a bag of Zapp’s, and have kombucha to drink.
12:00 – I teach my college class via Zoom. I last about an hour before my voice gives out and I end class a little early.
2:30 – While I wait for the students in my second class of the day to finish taking their online exam, I go on 1800PetMeds to buy allergy medication for my cat since we’re down to one last vial. Cost = $52.38
4:00 – I make dinner – ground beef stew with the groceries I got today. We had a cold front come through yesterday and it’s FINALLY cool enough to justify eating this!
6:00 – My boyfriend comes home and has a bowl of beef stew while we bitch about people not respecting public health guidelines during COVID.
7:00 – I read in bed while my boyfriend watches a movie. He comes to bed around 9:00 because he needs to get up early tomorrow too.
Daily expenses: $250.53
Tuesday
5:00 – I wake up, again.
5:30 - I teach three English classes back-to-back. Two of the kids are great and one is a total spaz the whole time and won’t sit still.
7:00 – Breakfast! You know how this goes.
7:30 – I’ve had a scratchy throat and runny nose all day so I take it easy all morning, reading in bed and drinking tea.
11:30 – Lunchtime! I eat a can of vegetable soup, some salami, cheese, and a clementine.
12:00 – I have office hours and spend my time grading papers.
2:30 – I review my notes for my college class tomorrow.
6:00 – I eat dinner: leftover beef stew from yesterday.
7:00 – I read the new issue of Harper’s Monthly in bed until I conk out around 9:30.
Daily expenses: $0
Weekly Tally:
Food + Drink: $198.15
Fun / Entertainment: $0
Home + Health: $256.53
Clothes + Beauty: $42.60
Transport: $0
Other: $81.70
This was a normal week for me in quarantine, other than the big Ikea order, but I felt like I had to jump on that because they’ve had shortages in their stock all year. I’m doing well in balancing savings and spending on little things that make quarantine easier. Also, this has definitely made it easier to start cooking more with what I have around the house rather than getting takeout.
I’m working on socking away as much money as I can right now so in case I lose my job next year, or if my boyfriend broke up with me for some reason, I’d have enough money in liquid savings that I’d be all right for a while. If neither of those things happen, I am taking an EPIC SUMMER VACATION next year as long as the COVID vaccine is being distributed by then and infection rates are plummeting.
Thanks for reading, everyone!

[M4A] (A playing as F) Massive list of RP prompts (Rule 34, fandoms, Games, OC, Incest Ect.)

Hey there! Today I’ve got a massive list of rp ideas and have written out some starters along with some ideas to how I see the rp going. I’m open to change and ready to do other ideas too. So if you feel like you’ve got an idea I might be interested in feel free to talk to me about those: ).
As for my replies. I write in first person mainly and my reply length varies. I generally do anything from a few sentences to a paragraph or more and generally require my partner to do the same. Fair warning the less detail you reply with the less interested I’ll be in rping with you. (Not looking for a few words as a response)
I enjoy having a story to go along with the smut so it’s not just constant sex, some cute or action driven moments are fun as well. – Hand holding and cute dates are pleasant! I mainly do my rps on kik, discord or here. I also have an RP facebook account, so feel free to ask for my users for those! : )
My kinks and limits list might be a big read, but none are compulsory. I’m just here to have fun and hopefully meet some cool rp partners : )
Kinks: Harems (Doesn’t mean having to play all characters at once, just one by one is fine!), Incest, Outercourse (Which is stuff like titjobs, thigh jobs, grinding, hot dogging) Risky public spaces (Toilet stalls, changing booths. That kinda thing where people could get caught.) Facials, Freckles (Face and body). Big/nicely shaped bums (Especially if they jiggle). Creampies, Cum on tits/body, big cumshots, Thigh high socks. showewater sex (pools, shower, hot tubs ect.) Mutual desire for sex.
Limits: Pregnancy (Hard limit sorry), Vomit, Piss, Blood, Toilet stuff, Rape, Gangbangs (Unless it’s multiple females) Male on Male, futas, rimming/pegging.
There might be more that I’m forgetting so if you’re unsure feel free to ask me! The rougher side of sex like Name calling, slapping choking spanking I can all do as well! : ) Without further ado let’s jump into the starters!
Disclaimer: I am 18+ and all participants and characters must be 18+
Here's the basic list of ideas if you wanted to look them over before reading the full posts. I’m also open to some ideas that I may have missed! And please note: I’m looking for FEMALE characters only!
Rule 34/Fandom/Game Ideas: Idea 1: My Harem (Hero) Academia. Idea 2: Pokémon Idea 3: Naruto Idea 4: Bleach Idea 5: One piece. Idea 6: Sword Art Online. Idea 7: Fairy Tail. Idea 8: Avatar The Last Airbender. Idea 9: Persona (Girls from 4 and 5). Idea 10: Harry Potter. Idea 11: Final Fantasy. Idea 12: The Witcher 3.
OC Ideas: Idea 13: Fantasy harem adventure. Idea 14: Only Man of the town. Idea 15: Zombie and Nuclear Apocalypse. Idea 16: Sci-Fi space crew.
Incest Ideas: Idea 17: Brother sisteMother son (Or both). Idea 18: Aunt/Cousin. (Can be both) Idea 19: Incest family vacation.
Idea 1: My Harem (Hero) Academia.
(So my character will be a transfer into Class 1-A. His power is the power of persuasion. With the power he’s able to convince someone to do something as if it’s their own will. However, he’s hesitant to use it on other people and to tell everyone he even has it as he’s been outcast at his last school for the villainous nature of his quirk. As such he can’t use it to its full extent and can only issue small commands to begin with.
My idea with this is that one or more (cannon or non) of the girls decide to help him out in a private setting and overtime it gets more and more sexual in nature. And as he becomes more confident, he’s able to issue more longer-term commands. This can also be mixed in well with some story and some action to keep the plot interesting.)
Starter: It was a day which started like most others in Class 1-A. The students got ready in the dorms and headed to class to chat among themselves while they waited for Aizawa to enter. However, unlike most days there seemed to be an extra desk placed in the room. The seat caused some confusion which didn’t last long as the first bell rang and Aizawa entered the room.
“Morning everyone.” He stated in his mainly bored and sleepy tone which seemed to sound like he was stifling a yawn. “Today we’ve got a new student transferring in from another school. He’s from Shiketsu, some of you may recognize the name since it’s got the same level as prestige as U.A. but regardless make sure he feels welcome.” He said pointing a sweeping stare at everyone and finally resting on the problem child of the U.A class Bakugo.
With that he fell silent and I felt it was my cue to enter. Swallowing a little at the nerves I steeled them quickly and entered. My blue eyes sweeping over some of the familiar faces in the room. Many of the students had standout performances in the UA sports festival and as well in the news reports about the villain attack on the training camp.
I had a lot to live up to if I wanted to join these legends in training but regardless, I was determined to do just that. Breathing a little and shifting my auburn hair from my eyes I smiled the best I could. “My name is Schwarzer, Chris Schwarzer. It’s a pleasure to meet you all.” I say bowing to the class.
Satisfied with the introduction Aizawa nodded to the spare seat in the room. Taking that as an order I nodded back and headed over to my seat sitting down and getting my books out. Curiously I turned to the seat next to me noticing one of the girls in the class and gave her a slight smile as Aizawa began his lesson.
Idea 2: Pokemon. (So this one is super simple. Some trainers or a trainer and his Pokémon go on a grand adventure. For this one my favourite Canon female are: Marnie, May, Hilda and May. And my favourite Anthro Pokémon are Lopunny, Arcanine, Blaiziken That’s just for reference though and you can really play whoever you like! Ocs are of course welcome too!)
Trainer x Trainer Starter:
I like many others in the world of Pokémon have just started on my journey. Although I had done so a little late. Regardless me and my starter Pokémon Aipom which was a gift from my late father. Setting off with excitement to make a name of myself.
That excitement wore off pretty quickly however as an advanced trainer stepped in my path and soon, I realized how big the gap between us was. He wiped the floor with my aipom and laughed as he took my “Prize money” Scooping up my aipom I rushed through the rest of the route and over to the next town ducking quickly into the Pokémon centre.
Looking around there was a few new trainers who seemed to have fallen to the same fate as I had and I shook my head. Guys like that were total assholes and without hesitating I headed over to the counter where the nurse took my Aipom from me. Once he was gone, I was told there was going to be a short wait due to the amount of Pokémon they had to treat. I nodded as I headed over and sat down in one of the seats.
Idea 3: Naruto. (So for this one I like the idea that my character is a nomadic mercenary hired by the leaf to help train the ninja of the village, maybe he also has some kind of hidden power that boosts his chakra but also increases his libido. Not too sure how I wanna go about this one.)
Starter: The Hokage Tsunade Senju looked over me with a curious gaze and then down to my application form. “You’re younger than I expected given everything you’ve done.” She stated honestly. “But the intelligence division did a thorough search into you and you check out.” She stated as she slammed the approved stamp down onto my paper.
“Just remember, if you do anything to endanger this village, I’ll snuff you out personally.” She said in an icy and threatening tone. Feeling a cold bead of sweat roll down the side of my face I nodded. “Of course. I wouldn’t dream of it.” I say. Internally I make a mental note not to cross her in any way.
“Good.” She said putting a smile across her features. “Your first group is down on the training field waiting for you already.” She stated. “Your lodgings will be set up by the time you’re done, here’s the key.” She said tossing the key to me which I caught and stuffed into my pocket. I was a little shocked with how quick she wanted me to get to work but I nodded. “Right!” I say giving a respectful bow before heading out.
It took me a little longer than expected to actually find the training grounds as I hadn’t ever been here before. And when I got there much to her credit there were a few ninja standing around. Approaching them I gave them a sheepish smile. “Sorry I’m late guys.” I called out. “I got lost.” I added on.
Idea 4: Bleach. (So a new human soul reaper makes it into the soul society. His power isn’t captain level to begin with simply being enough to take out the average hollow. And with the resurgence of the hollow threat the Soul Society has offered to give him a substitute badge to take out those hollows deemed too small for the soul society to handle. Maybe he’s paired up with someone or someone like Orihime steps in to help him grow.)
Starter: Another boring day at school followed by a night of boring patrols. With all the big hollows being taken care of by “Full-fledged” Soul reapers it didn’t leave me with much opportunity to train against bigger enemies.
At least that’s what I thought originally. A few blocks from me there was a rift which opened up and the pure spiritual pressure that came from the hollow that stepped out of it was enough to make me feel as though gravity itself was pushing against me.
It was hard to breathe and even harder to stand as my hand clutched my blade in my left hand tightly. I shook my head as I heard the loud roar of the large breast and could even see it’s towering form from my position.
It was nothing close to a menos, but it was enough to tower over a three-story building for sure. “Shit.” I hissed to myself as I knew there were no soul reapers around at this stage. With a threat this big I was sure they’d come, but until then it was up to me to buy some time and make sure no humans or souls were consumed.
Pushing myself forward I reached the park that the Hollow had appeared in. Thankfully the park was deserted at this time of night. When he saw me the hollow. “You don’t smell like much, but you’ll do as a snack.” The hollow commented as it charged forward. “Just evade, buy time.” I comment to myself as I began to leap around the battle field looking a bit like and feeling like an idiot.
The hollow toyed with me a little while enjoying the chase before it seemed to ger bored. Just when I was thinking I was fast enough to keep avoiding it the creature’s mouth opened and its forked tongue shot out at me with faster speed than I was anticipating I raised my blade to defend myself but it was a feeble attempt and I knew it wouldn’t be enough.
Idea 5: One Piece. (So I’m not quite sure how to approach this one, but I’ll give it a go. Much like the MHA starter my character will have the power of persuasion, having eaten the Persua-Persua fruit. I’m thinking either he joins the Strawhats and goes on their adventures or he makes his own crew with girls from the story, I’m gonna leave it fairly open ended so we can jump in whenever along the story we wanna go!)
Starter: Alone in a bar I sat staring in the amber liquid in my mug. I was down on my luck after having my whole crew and my ship destroyed in a long battle another pirate crew. The only reason I was able to live through the ordeal was due to my crew sacrificing themselves to give me a chance to escape.
I spent days adrift with little food and water and soon washed up upon the island I was in. Immediately I found a tavern ready to drown my sorrows and feel sorry for myself for a little while.
Letting out a sigh I downed the rest of my drink soon looking at the few drops of liquid bottom of my mug. I knew being a pirate wouldn’t be easy, I knew it’d be violent and end in violence. However, to lose in that fashion without even being able to use my devil fruit to calm or question our opponent and losing everything still took its toll on me.
Scratching at the growing stubble with one hand, the other I raised my mug to demand another drink and as such the bartender approached to fill my mug. “You’re looking a little rough there, you sure you need another?” The bartender asked as he took the mug from me. “I don’t have anything else to do. I don’t even know what else to do with myself.” I responded grumpily. “Just fill it up.” I demanded. “Right.” The bartender responded as he filled it with more of the alcoholic amber liquid and slid It in front of me.
Idea 6: Sword Art Online. (Fairly simple it’s SAO set in the original death game. I love the idea, so I’ve always loved rping this one. If you want to play canon characters my fave is for sure Lizbeth, but I’m open to OC characters!)
Starter: It’s been months since Akihiko Kayaba has trapped us into this death game. Or at least that’s how some people looked at it. Others saw it as their dream come true. But most if not, all wanted to push forward and beat the game.
Despite the desire to push forward little progress has been made. Guilds and parties have formed to push through dungeons but with the increased danger and with it more deaths; more and more people simply decided to live out their lives on the lower floors.
Unlike those rushing in to push through the content I was happy enough to go through it at my own pace. This place was like a dream for me, save for the fact I had an increased chance of dying I was able to live in this game without the worries of the outside world.
I was doing some late-night grinding in an area of dense forest. The sun had set and there was little light save for the bright moon poking through the trees. All was calm, the trees swayed with the wind and the occasional sound of creatures moving about was enough to calm me.
However, the deeper I got into the forest the louder a sound became. At first it was quiet but as I approached, I heard it more clearly. It sounded like steel clashing against steel. Someone was fighting. Moving from a casual walk into a jog I quickly came to a small clearing where I saw two figures fighting, although in the low light I couldn’t make it out until I got closer.
Idea 7: Fairy Tail. (it’s been a little while since I’ve seen the series, but I’ve always loved it! Given my time away I might have to take some time to refamiliarize myself with the magics. My character will simply be an entry level member into the guild to begin with, canon characters are welcome just as OCs are!)
Starter: Another day in magnolia and another party being held at the large guild building at the centre of town. A large-scale job had just finished with some of the senior ranking wizards. and even though I wasn’t part of that mission, instead being on my own D-Rank job I joined in on the celebrations.
I had only been part of the guild for a few days and so far, it’s not been as exciting as I’d hoped, although I figured that it’d pick up once I proved myself. I was drinking by myself when I was approached by Makarov. He was wearing an essentric looking orange outfit. “Schwarzer my boy!” He said as he patted me on the shoulder. “How are you fitting in?” He questioned. “Fine sir! Everyone has been very welcoming.” I say to him in response. “Glad to hear it! You’ve been doing a good job, although I’d like to see you do more.” The male said. “So I’ve arranged a partner for you on your next job, that way you can take something more challenging, what do you say?” He questioned.
“Yes of course!” I say eagerly as a smile spread across my face. “Great!” He said cheerfully. “I’ll introduce you to who you’ll be working with.” He said as he stood from his spot and lead the way over to a female clearing his throat loud enough to get their attention.
Idea 8: Avatar the Last Airbender. (So for this one I guess it can go two different ways. My fave girls from Avatar would probably be Ty Lee, Suki and Toph. Maybe my character is a powerful bender that either the fire nation or team Avatar wants on their side. I think it might be cool to think that Aang isn’t the only airbender and instead a small faction managed to escape and continue the lineage. Either that or my character is a powerful firebender of some kind. I’ll leave whichever you prefer to you in your first reply as I’ll leave it open ended.)
Starter: The world was at war ever since the Fire nation attacked. With the intense fighting came mercenaries. Freelance benders or soldiers ready to fight on either side. For a fee of course. And despite my age, being only eighteen I was quite renown amongst the other bounty hunters for my bending.
Of course, there were talks of the Avatar returning, having repelled an invasion in the south pole, the liberation of Omashu and then the fire nation prison. It seemed they were making quite the stir in the earth kingdom.
It’d only be a matter of time before they reached the small town, I was in. Perhaps they were already here. But if that was the case surely there would be some kind of stir. Pushing my hair from my face I ordered another drink from the barkeep. “You know you’re my favourite customer Schwarzer…. You’re the only one who consistently pays his tab. Unlike the rest of these soldiers or the workers around here.” The older man says in clear annoyance.
“Well who knows, if I wasn’t so successful, I’d probably mooch off you too.” I admitted with a grin. “Try not to talk too ill of the soldiers on either side.” I added on flicking him an extra coin for a tip once my drink was finished. “Well I better check if anyone has a job for me.” I say as I pushed myself up from my seat.
Idea 9: Persona. (So basically this is just gonna be a fairly interesting idea. My character along with the girls of persona 4 and 5 get stranded in this strange dimension where they have to fight their way out to make it back to their own worlds.)
Starter: It all happened so fast. One minute I was in a team meeting with my group discussing what we should use our newfound powers for next. And the next second, I had blinked and I was in some kind of strange room.
One by one more people were added into this room. Some of which were dressed in some elaborate costumes. And I frowned as I looked to each one of them, all of which I didn’t recognize at all and judging by their looks they didn’t recognize me. Although before we managed to introduce ourselves a booming voice broke the silence.
“Welcome all!” The clearly male voice commented. “To the room of my design.” He added on. “I’m sure you’re all confused. And no doubt you’ll want to return back to your homes. However, to do so you’ll need to enter my labyrinth. “Make it to the end and you’ll all return home.” The voice explained.
“Of course, this maze isn’t without its dangers. Enemies, much like you encounter on a regular basis will roam these halls. As well as beasts of my own design far stronger than those… Fear no though for every check point you reach this room will become more furnished with amenities. For now, you simply have beds to rest on.” He said as there was an audible click and the dark room was suddenly lit up. Sure, enough there were rows of beds all lined up one for each person to sleep on.
“When you’re ready to test yourselves step through this door and enter the first level of the labyrinth.” He declared as a large door appeared and opened up in front of them. For a while nobody said anything probably all too stunned to even process the information. “So, I’m guessing we’re all persona users given what he just said.” I spoke up. “I guess we should probably start with names and strengths, right?” I questioned the group. “I’m Chris Schwarzer.” I say. “My persona Serapth focuses on ranged combat.” I explained.
Idea 10: Harry Potter. (So to keep this one interesting I’m thinking of having it set in an AU where Voldemort and Harry don’t exist. However, there are still dark wizards who are part of a cult around. Defs looking for a Hermionie, Luna or Ginny, you could even have other celebs/ecelebs as teachers or students for this one! Ocs are of course welcome too!)
Starter: Another year at Hogwarts, the last for some; and another year of learning was right around the corner. Although times were not peaceful in the wizarding world. Aurors who were the police of the magical world were going missing or showing up dead.
The ministry not wanting to make a panic kept it fairly under wraps, however some of the families have come forward with the information and rumours abounded about what was really happening. Stepping off the train I sighed a little rubbing my temple where a headache had begun to set in. During the train ride here, I found myself stuck next to a boy who wouldn’t stop going on about the rumours and conspiracy theories.
Glad to be off the train I looked around for a minute lost as to where I needed to go. “I know it’s around here somewhere.” I commented, although my sense of direction was always off. Usually I followed everyone else. But this time it seemed I was one of the last ones off the train.
Idea 11: Final Fantasy. (So this is simply going to be an idea with no starter since it will probably change depending on the many FF universes. My favourite however is defs FF7. (Tifa, Jessie and Aerith are best girls) with follow-ups being 12, 13, 15, 10, 8 and 9. Basically a fight would take the Main character of those series, Cloud, Noct, ect out of commission and needing a leader the other characters step up and hire mine on. Similar to some of my other prompts but I never said I was creative :^) With that being said though if you ARE interested in this one let me know and we can work out details depending on what world we’re in!)
Idea 12: The Witcher 3. (So my character will be a Witcher. (wow!) Saving people, hunting things you know? The family business. Anyway, I’m gonna leave it super open ended for you to come in however you like! If you wanna play a canon character my top two are for sure Ciri and Trist, and OC characters are accepted too!)
Starter: A Werewolf, an odd and rare contract, although I figured it wouldn’t be a hard one. In face I figured with my silver blade that the creature would go down rather quickly. Starting the encounter, I was faced with a harsh reality due to my hubris. I started off well enough, however due to my carelessness I was quickly on the backfoot.
The beast roared as it swung its large clawed hand towards me. I had barely managed to roll out of the way of the attack. Probably due to the increasing levels of bloodless resulting in a careless action on my part. A level of confidence quickly pushed down by the fact a handful of open wounds stung at my flanks.
More scars for later given that I make it out of here, although with my silver blade thrown on the other side of the area leaving me with only a steel sword which barely even phases the thing. I had to reach my blade, although with my focus on dodging the attacks it was hard to find an opening to do so.
I raised a hand and cast the igni sign launching flames at the creature who leapt back and I tried my best to make it past the creature only to have to dodge another strike as the beast recovered remarkably fast. “Stubborn bastard, aren’t you?” I questioned a little sourly.
Idea 13: Fantasy harem adventure. (This one is fairly basic in nature. Basically, a young man with little combat experience leaves his poor hunting village once he’s of age and sets off to join the adventurer’s guild to make a name for himself and also to send money back home. He’s fairly modest, naive and kind hearted. Which makes him likable and easy to take advantage of.
We could add a story with war elements, racism and darker themes to show him that the world he idolizes isn’t as cracked up as he thought it’d be. Ideally, I’d like a full harem party for this one but I’m cool with one on one too.)
Starter: It had been a few days since I was finally able to leave the small village, I was raised in behind me. Sword on hip and keen to become an adventurer. Of course, I also wanted to make a name for myself and I was even more excited to see everything the world had to offer. With driving me forward I headed from my village over to the closest city which had a guild branch. A city called Ruan. It was nearly five times the size of my village if not more and yet it was nothing close to the capital city of Grancel.
Smooth dirt paths soon gave way to cobblestone and my boots clacked rhythmically against the pavement as my steps soon got faster and faster as Ruan came into view. My stomach was in knots as I gripped the straps on my bag tightly and after steeling my nerves and taking in the sight of the large city, I headed through the large stone arch to the busy streets beyond.
My excited eyes looked around at every nook and cranny as I took in every detail that was on offer. Soon coming across the large marble and wood building of the adventurer’s guild in front of me. I stood in front of the large building clearly awestruck and for a moment I felt completely overwhelmed. This was it. This was the first step I was going to take on my journey and yet I felt far too nervous to head inside. Instead I stood there shaking slightly as I tried to work up the courage to push those large oak doors aside and declare my presence to the world.
Idea 14: Man of the town. (So again the premise is also pretty basic. My character wakes up in a town where there’s no men, as if they all vanished at once. Including his father which leaves him home alone with his sister and mother. (It’s up to you if you want incest in the plot or not.) We can have a story with an element of mystery to it too if you want! Or we can just bounce around the town having him bonk as many different people as you want.)
Starter: It’s been a few weeks since all the men in the town vanished one day. One day they were there and the next they were gone. There was of course a panic even though it is much calmer than originally, it continues to creep in the back of everyone’s mind. It doesn’t help the fact that no outsiders have come into the town and some strange thick fog seems to stop everyone from leaving.
However, with no answers it was left to the women of the town to pick up the slack and try to push for some level of normalcy. Except for me it seemed. Since the whole act started, I was in lockdown not being free to leave my home since my mother and sister was much too paranoid that I’d disappear too. With the amount of time I spent indoors going stir crazy I began to wonder if it was better to be wherever the rest of them are.
Today was different though and finally I was given the chance to leave the house while my mother was careless and rather quickly, I headed out into the street just glad to take in the scenery as I headed over to a nearby park. I headed over the soft grass feeling it beneath my shoes and then to the pond where I took a seat on one of the mounted benches.
Idea 15: Zombie and Nuclear Apocalypse. (Not a whole lot to say here other than it’s one of your run of the mill Zombie/Nuclear apocalypse scenarios. I might toy with the idea of having multiple zombie types like games such as Dying light and Left for dead in order to spice things up a little but we’ll see where we go with it. As for nuclear I’ll probably be following along the Fallout franchise. Being part of these worlds will probably make my character a bit more brash, blunt and even a little rude. However, given some time he’ll warm up.)
Zombie Starter: No one knows quite when the outbreak started, however it swept over the globe causing panic. People eating people. People dying and coming back to life as a shambling corpse joining the armies of similar creatures. Society crumbled over time and the cities which were now hot zones for hordes of the undead creatures were left abandoned to all but the most daring or desperate of individuals. However, these rabid hordes weren’t the only thing to look out for in the apocalypse.
Society had begun to reform in its most primal form. People grouped together for safety. Those who just wanted to live peacefully became easy prey for those who saw the end of the world as we knew it as a playground to kill pillage and steal what they’d like. These bandits created their own factions with their own fortresses and seemed to have an endless supply of guns and ammo as they used it quite liberally.
I had been on the trail of a particularly nasty group of bandits as they razed whatever small settlements, they had to the ground callously and without mercy. I had just arrived at one of these towns. Dying people lay scattered about while fires licked at the makeshift buildings. It was still quite fresh. Approaching a nearby body which seemed to be moving slightly I turned it over the man was in bad shape and was clearly on death’s door. His eyes looking into mine in a pleading sense.
“Do you want me to make it quick?” I asked him reaching my left hand down to my machete which hung on my belt. Weakly his hand reached out to grip my right as he gave a nod. I knew the death wouldn’t be clean, as I unsheathed my blade. However, I couldn’t waste any ammo on my pistol nor could I risk tipping off the bandits that did this that I was following them. With a quick swing I slammed the blade into the head of the man ending his life and after wiping the blade off on his shirt I slid it back into its sheath my eyes scanning the immediate area for any of the undead which had turned or for a slim chance of getting a glimpse of survivors.
Nuclear Apocalypse Starter:
The world as we knew it ended in a flash. A white light followed by a rumble which washed over the world in nuclear fire. Billions died then and there reducing the world’s population to the brink. Those who were lucky to survive a direct blast were mutated to become much different than humans and more akin to zombies. Those outside of it didn’t have much quality of life as the radiation created mutated creatures which made living in a barren wasteland that much harder.
There were others however who were lucky enough to be given a spot in giant underground vaults. There they lived out their lives separated from the horrors that this new world wrought. One by one these vaults opened to allow these vault dwellers into the wasteland that was our world.
Their blue suits and clueless natures made them stand out and become easy prey to raiders, giant creatures and everything in between. Many of them didn’t get far before being gutted and robbed for their illusive vault suits which earned enough to feed a scavenger or bandit for a month.
The world and society began to rebuild. And with small settlements and towns popping up here and there it wasn’t all doom and gloom for the wasteland. Many were able to create jobs in local milita, mercenary work. Even trading or bartending.
I was such a mercenary a few generations of my family lived through the bombing and the radiation which was lucky enough for me, I guess. I was hired to do whatever someone wanted for the right price. And today I was tasked with delving into a recently opened vault and check make contact with the inhabitants inside.
Colt python on my waist I headed over to the large vault door which at this point was sealed shut and knocked loudly. This job seemed rather easy and was paying a lot which made me wonder who I was working for and what purpose they had with these vault dwellers. However, I wasn’t paid to ask questions nor did I really care at the end of the day. The less I knew the less guilt I could feel.
Idea 16: Space/Scifi. (So this is a scifi adventure. My character is the captain of his own ship and is currently looking for recruits to join him and help run it. There will probably be lots of interesting planets our characters go to and I’ll certainly be making them up as we go along! Your character can range as anything from a human to android or even an alien.)
Starter: Stepping out of The Tempest I breathed in the humid station air of Astra station. The station which was on the furthest reaches of the space ruled over the galactic council; was a haven for the depraved. Outlaws, mercenaries, drug dealers you name it Astra has it and in bountiful supply too.
Which made it a perfect spot to find someone who was desperate to get off the station. Someone who would work for cheap or for free. All I needed to do was to find them. “Schwarzer, don’t forget to stock up on food, military rations are sad.” A voice commented through the earpiece I had. “Yeah. I’ll head through the slums and to the market. Thanks, Evai.” I responded. “And don’t cause any trouble, I don’t wanna rot in this ship while you’re dead.” The voice added on. “Yeah yeah I’ve got it.” I responded as the communication line was severed and I started on my walk.
I headed through a nearby door and down into the depths of the station. Soon I the overcrowded and frankly smelly slums. Beggars and gang members lined every corner all looking at me with a cautious eye as I passed. There were even a few tweaked out drug users laying scattered about in some dark corners. Even a few corpses.
I didn’t stop though, if you stayed in one place too long down here you were asking to be jumped and quickly, I pushed on heading over to the bustling markets. The food quality here wasn’t the best although it was abundant. I even talked to a few of the store owners to see if they knew where I could find the extra hands to help me on my ship.
Idea 17: Brother sisteMother son (Or both). (So, this starter is gonna be fairly generic, however it’s open to allowing any of the familial ties to be easily included. I have a few ideas for immediate family and will post them below and if you have any ideas, I’m happy to hear them.)
Starter: It’s a hot and lazy day in the middle of summer break. I had laid splayed out on the couch at home. Despite the air conditioner being on full blast my skin underneath my tank top was getting stuck to the leather couch; which did little to alleviate the heat fluster that was going on. I sighed after looking over the back of the couch to the pool outback longingly. I sighed a little resigning myself to bite the bullet and peeled myself from the couch.
As much as I wanted to strip down and run out, I wasn’t entirely sure if I was home alone and as such, I headed up to my room to change into a pair of swimming trunks before heading back downstairs. Passing through the laundry and grabbing a towel on the way.
I headed onto the back deck and draped my towel over the railing before I rushed over and leapt into the pool immediately feeling the cool water wash away any of the heat I had been feeling. I resurface and breathed a sigh of relief as I pushed my messy hair back from my face.
Idea 18: Aunt/Cousin (Can be both). (Again like the incest scene above I’m not quite sure how to spruce this one up so I’ll leave it rather basic and we can go from there.)
Starter: My family has gone on holiday without me as I had to stay behind due to being caught up in exams. Rather than meeting up with them later they decided it would be more fun for me if I finished them up then headed over to spend some time with my Aunt and my cousin across the county. While I wouldn’t be leaving the country, I was still getting a vacation in a way and as such I tried my best to be upbeat and positive about it, even if I was envious of the others.
While it wasn’t the same pristine beaches and high-class resorts that the rest of my family was going to, I was still grateful for the hospitality. The plane lands in the airport and after collecting my bags and checking my phone for a confirmation I was going to be picked up I sent my family and my aunt and cousin a quick text telling them I landed safely. After gathering my small suitcase from the conveyor belt, I wheeled it through security and out to the meeting area keeping my eyes peeled for any sign of my cousin or my auntie. There was a little confusion about who was going to greet me so I wasn’t sure who to expect myself.
Idea 19: Incest family vacation. (So, this one is again going to be like the other two before it. They kinda roll off each other in a way. However, I believe it allows for a wide range of engagements with multiple characters at some kind of beach resort.)
Starter: It’s the dead middle of another scorching summer and rather than tough it out in our homes which has air-conditioning which never seemed to help, our large family decided to all go to a large resort (Could even be a cruise too) together. Many of the rooms were rather luxurious and I was more than excited to see what the rest of the hotel had to offer.
We pulled up into the lobby and while the parents were checking in I headed over to check out a map on the wall. It seemed there were quite a lot of different things to do around the resort. There was a pool with a poolside bar, a beach which had volleyball games, a massage parlour, hot tubs and many different activities ranging from native dances to eating competitions.
Just the realization we were here and the excitement at the many possibilities that could come from the vacation. Maybe I’d even meet someone nice and have a vacation fling. Although with so many family members running around, I doubted that I’d get much peace to do that. Regardless I was eager to get up to the room, have a shower and change into my swimming trunks to explore all the different places.
We headed up to the rooms where I noticed mine had a large double bed. However, judging by my mother’s comments outside It seemed there was some kind of mix-up in the rooms and I’d be sharing the room with one of my family members. Not that I minded too much. I placed my suitcase down and waited to see who would come in and if they were interested in joining me look around.
Closing words: So yeah that’s about it! Thanks for reading and if you have any questions or suggestions, I’m open to hearing them! I know this was probably a big read so thanks again for your time and I hope to talk to some of you soon!

It's been 1 year since Apple TV+ began, and I have watched every one of their shows (except the kids stuff)! Here's my ranking...[No Spoilers]

In one year, Apple TV+ has released a pretty solid slate of original material. Not including children-oriented content, Apple TV+ has released 20 series, 3 miniseries, 9 movies, and 2 talk shows. From the start, Apple has said that the goal of the content is on quality, not quantity. But…has it lived up to that?
34 - Greatness Code - Documentary
Summary: Each episode features a different athlete talking about a key moment in their careers. The show features athletes from many different sports, including basketball’s LeBron James, soccer’s Alex Morgan (sorry…footballer Alex Morgan), snowboarder Shaun White, sprinter Usain Bolt, swimmer Katie Ledecky, surfer Kelly Slater, and (American) footballer Tom Brady (who is a co-producer).
My Take: This is the easy winner for the worst thing on Apple TV+. The only good thing about this “show” is that the episodes are usually no more than 10 minutes long. The monologues by the athletes are…fine. There’s nothing you haven’t really heard before here. The problem is that the special effects take away from actually seeing the athlete in action. Almost every bit of action has some animation or filter or something over it, so we almost never actually see the events being discussed. It’s pretty ridiculous. After watching this, I genuinely wondered if this series was intended to be part of Apple TV+’s children’s offerings, because that is the only level where it could at all seem “great”.
33 - Oprah Talks Covid-19 - News (Miniseries)
Summary: Not long after the COVID-19 pandemic started major lockdowns across the United States, Oprah quickly began to do online interviews with people who she hoped would bring perspective and uplifting messages, from celebrities to pastors to nurses to people who had experienced isolation in prison and the holocaust. This series ran for nearly a month from mid-March to mid-April in 2020.
My Take: One of Oprah’s three series, this one is the lowest ranked just because much of the information within it is out of date, and is aimed at people at a certain time, which was months ago. But in a way, it’s a bit of a time capsule of the early parts of the pandemic in the public eye, which is interesting. It’s almost as interesting to see the production value (or lack there of), as the majority of the episodes are screen recordings of online interviews. It’s perhaps only worth watching now for being a curiosity, but Apple and Oprah did good getting something up in a timely fashion.
32 - Amazing Stories - Adventure
Summary: An anthology series executive produced by Steven Spielberg, the show brings back the “Amazing Stories” brand with five independent stories about incredible adventures that play with sci-fi and fantasy about regular people put in amazing situations.
My Take: Amazing Stories was to be one of Apple TV’s tentpoles for the summer. Unfortunately, the series landed flat, and is by far the biggest disappointment. It’s yet another TV series that original co-Producer Bryan Fuller left. The show was originally to have ten episodes, it ended up with just five. The stories were not very groundbreaking, though they were beautifully shot. It might be worth checking out for Robert Forster’s last project before he died (Dynoman and the Volt), and for the touching “The Heat” about high school runners from Oakland.
31 - Home - Documentary
Summary: As you might imagine, this documentary series is not just about the architecture of a house, but about the people behind building and designing them. Each episode features a different house and story, with houses chosen from around the world, from urban environments like Chicago and Hong Kong to remote locations in Maine and Bali.
My Take: Although cable and streaming is littered with television programs about houses and architecture, this show passes on the drama, which helps Home become a documentary, and not a reality show. The cinematography is predictably beautiful, but the pacing is slow, and it’s very hard to really get into. It doesn’t help that a couple of the home builders behind the stories are honestly not very likable. The final episode of the first season is really good, but ultimately, this show is a bit of a snooze beyond the real enthusiasts.
30 - Dads - Documentary (Movie)
Summary: Directed by Bryce Dallas Howard, this movie looks at fathers across the many levels of fatherhood, anchored by Howard’s own relationship with her father, actodirector Ron Howard, and her grandfather Archie, as well as Bryce’s non-celebrity brother who is an expecting father. The movie shifts to stories about fathers from around the world, and back to the Howards, to celebrate the ever-shifting role of fatherhood in modern society.
My Take: This documentary is a sweet, if simple, tribute to modern fatherhood. There’s nothing special here, it does exactly what you would expect it to. It has cameo interviews from comedian fathers, interspersed with random recordings of fathers from home movies and social media, and stories of fathers in different situations. There’s nothing bad about it, but it’s pretty dry overall. It’s not a waste, but it’ll probably end up being the thing you see in the list and say “Oh, I’ll watch that another time…”, which might as well be next Father’s Day with your dad.
29 - Dear… - Documentary
Summary: A documentary series that details the history and life of various individual celebrities, and uses letters written by people they have affected to frame those celebrities’ impact on people and society.
My Take: Apple has used the advertising method of using letters written to Apple or Tim Cook about how things have changed their lives (particularly the Apple Watch), and in that context this series feels like, well, advertising. Not to take anything away from the celebrities involved, but the marketing push feels very heavy here. And, of course, one of the celebrities featured is Oprah, who is a big presence in ATV+. It also gets absurd with one episode around Big Bird (in character); of course, the Muppets have a spin-off in the kids section of ATV+ called Helpsters. It’s best with the smaller names, where even I learned a little bit. It’s a decent feel-good if that’s what you’re looking for.
28 - Long Way Up - Documentary (Miniseries)
Summary: The third docu-series by Ewan McGregor and his best friend Charley Boorman as they take a long road trip by motorcycle. This trip, they are traveling from the southern tip of South America up to Los Angeles, and are doing it (almost) entirely on electric vehicles. The series highlights both the places they visit along the way, and the travails (and successes) of using these new, custom-made electric motorcycles. (The other two series Long Way Round and Long Way Down have also been added to ATV+, though they are not ‘Apple Originals’.)
My Take: I’ve got to be honest, it’s hard to get into watching others take a road trip. It’s nice enough. The footage is beautiful, as they use everything from GoPro helmet cams to drones to capture the scenery. But the major source of tension here is Range Anxiety, and the biggest drama is in whether or not they can do it all on electric bikes. Still, it’s interesting to see parts of South America many aren’t familiar with, including deserts and the vast Patagonia. And Ewan does seem like someone that would be a great bloke to be mates with. Some people will really enjoy this, I’m just not one of them.
27 - The Elephant Queen - Documentary (Movie)
Summary: Narrated by the soft-spoken Chiwetel Ejiofor, an elephant herd must navigate the climate of the savannah to survive. Led by the matriarch, they must migrate before the dry season hits to stay around water, and then return to their normal grazing land. Along the way, we meet the many other creatures of the savannah and face the changing climates and droughts that get in the way of these pachyderms.
My Take: A documentary much in the style of the old Disney documentaries, the Elephant Queen does a lot of anthropomorphizing its subjects, who range from elephants to dung beetles, and follows them through a difficult season. It is borderline kids-oriented, but adults might enjoy this as well. It’s not afraid to delve into some sad situations, and there is an overriding theme of what happens in droughts that can not be ignored. A sweet film, perhaps a bit saccharine.
26 - Hala - Drama (Movie)
Summary: Hala is a Pakistani-American teenage girl and her trying to balance her family and cultural pressures with being a teen in America. She longs to be out of the pressures of her family’s culture as she interacts with friends and teachers outside of the home. When she does try to act out, she begins to discover more about her family, both discovering secrets and sides she never knew about, as she discovers more about herself.
My Take: Apple TV+’s first fictional feature film release, this coming of age film is never really surprising, but it is a well made film that hits all the right nuances in trying to share Hala’s experience. It’s not a perfect film, as there are some shifts in tone and character that are rather sudden and jarring for the viewer, though all things considered, that’s probably what writedirector Minhal Baig was trying for. The emotions shift quickly and non-family characters disappear quickly, as it’s clear that this is Hala’s story, and not anyone else’s. It’s a solid watch.
25 - Trying - Comedy
Summary: A British couple, Nikki and Jason, have decided to adopt when they have trouble conceiving. They struggle with the truly difficult process of adopting, as well as insecurities about whether or not the two (who could be called slackers) are truly ready to be, or even worthy of being, parents.
My Take: This is a British comedy co-produced by BBC that is about an intensely serious subject. If you know British humor, you know that it will be very intentionally awkward, and this series can definitely hit that mark. While the show is certainly has about its two main characters (Rafe Spall and Esther Smith as the couple), it has a surprisingly large cast of supporting characters, but with only one star most Americans would know (Imelda Staunton as the most unintimidating social worker ever). It’s an interesting concept, and it finds some sweet moments, but not as many funny ones. It’s not bad, but is just okay.
24 - Oprah’s Book Club - Talk Show
Summary: This was the first Oprah show to appear on Apple TV+, serving as a cross-section of Apple services (which advertises Books and Podcasts), and the only one that got to meet the pre-pandemic style of Oprah’s shows. The idea was that Oprah would interview authors and let an audience ask questions. But the series also shows the effects of the pandemic. Once the pandemic hits, the audience is gone, and it becomes direct virtual interviews for a couple of episodes before Apple and Oprah find a way to have a virtual audience.
My Take: I admit, I didn’t read any of the books selected for this list. I still got something out of these shows, but more of an analysis of Oprah than the books. It did show off one of her worst traits, which is how she answers for an interviewee when they were slow to find a point, and she talked over a lot of people. But you could also see her energy change when she had a live audience versus online interviews, and even different with a virtual audience. You could also see her energy change about what books she is passionate about versus those less so. So this wasn’t a waste, but I wasn’t enthusiastic.
23 - Truth Be Told - Drama
Summary: Poppy Parnell (Octavia Spencer) is a true crime podcaster after a successful career as an investigative reporter, but she comes to dwell on the first case that made her famous, where a teenager was put away for murdering his neighbor. Now an adult (played by Aaron Paul), Poppy begins talking with him to see if she made a mistake. Meanwhile, the victim’s family is forced to revisit the crime, including twin daughters (both played by Lizzy Caplan), and Poppy’s family confronts her for supporting Cave, who has joined a white supremacist gang in prison.
My Take: This show has an incredible cast, with Michael Beach, Mekhi Phifer, and Ron Cephas Jones in big supporting roles. Race is an unavoidable part of this story, but so is culture, as Poppy is split between her family’s blue-collar roots in Oakland, and the Silicon Valley lifestyle she now lives with her husband across the bay. The Bay Area setting of this series is a big part of the symbolism. The problem is that the mystery viewers came for was never really important. This would’ve been a good third season of a show, once a status quo for these characters had been found, rather than a confusing first season with lots of subplots.
22 - Central Park - Animation
Summary: Animated by the people behind Bob’s Burgers and created in part by Josh Gad, Central Park is an animated musical. The show revolves around the family of the manager of Central Park (Leslie Odom Jr.), and the villainous hotel owner (Stanley Tucci) who wants to undermine the park to buy it and develop it. Gad plays the busker at the park who serves as the audience’s narrator, and it plays like musical theater, with songs written by a range of artists, including Fiona Apple, Sara Bareilles, Cyndi Lauper, Aimee Mann, Alan Menken and Glenn Slater, and Meghan Trainor, among many others.
My Take: The show is silly, but not always in a funny way. The music is reminiscent of the irreverent nature of Avenue Q, and has some star power behind it, though a lot of the music is just meh. I’m not surprised my favorite song, “Spoiler Alert”, was cowritten by Alan Menken of 90’s Disney musical fame. The story, however, very often deviates from the main thrust of the plot and doesn’t seem like it’s going anywhere at times, as it’s more bothered with the humor in ridiculous situations, like the park manager’s son being obsessed with the villain’s dog Champagne. Ultimately, though, the show is just meh. The humor is fine, the story is barely relevant, and the majority of the music will not be found on many people’s playlists going forward, although of course you can find it all on Apple Music.
This show has been one of Apple TV’s only controversies, however. The cast is made from many of Gad’s friends. That led to some controversy, as Gad chose stars before choosing parts. Kristen Bell was put into the role of a bi-racial character, and the two villainous women in the series were played by men (Stanley Tucci and Daveed Diggs, though it’s hard to fault either performance). The controversy was first brought up over the winter. After the summer’s social upheaval, Bell stepped down from the role and her former character will be played in season 2 by Emmy Raver-Lampman. Bell will return as a new character in season 2.
21 - On The Rocks - Comedy (Movie)
Summary: Laura (Rashida Jones) is worried that her husband Dean (Marlon Wayans) may have gotten bored in their marriage and having an affair with a coworker. Laura’s father (Bill Murrary), a charming and unabashed ladies man, tries to help her figure out her suspicions as they follow Dean around.
My Take: Well, Apple TV+ paid for a Sofia Coppola film, and boy, did they get one. What this means is that this is a movie where the plot is less important than the conversation, and in particular, this might as well be a 2-person play between Jones and Murray. Murray is charming as basically a more chauvinistic version of himself, and Jones deadpan is the perfect counter. Ultimately the conversations are predictable, and the very obvious plot takes away any suspense. This lets the movie’s most emotionally revelatory scene go almost completely under the radar. Ultimately, it and any lessons from this film get lost in conversation. Luckily, though, Murray and Jones are enough to carry the film and stop it from becoming just plain lost.
20 - See - Drama
Summary: In the future, the world was hit with a virus that made all humans blind, and predictably led to a societal downfall. The remains of civilization live either in a world wildness has mostly reclaimed, or the ruins of what once was. The story centers on a family where two children have been born with sight, and their adoptive father (Jason Momoa) and their mother (Hera Hilmar), with friends, try to find others with sight, while being chased by a religious monarch and her soldiers, trying to rid the world of the sin of sight.
My Take: One of Apple TV+’s first showcase shows, with a bankable action star in Jason Momoa and a huge budget, See ended up as one of the platform’s disappointments. The show suffers because it’s trying to world build throughout its first season, but is constantly changing the status quo of the world through its first season. Time flies for the characters, as the kids born in the first episode are teens in 3 episodes. Supporting characters are set up and then lost in the shuffle. The show does a fantastic job putting together a realistic world of how the sightless would build a civilization, but it’s not enough to make up for a plot that barely sets a status quo before blowing it up for a new quo.
19 - Bruce Springsteen’s Letter To You - Documentary (Movie)
Summary: A documentary recorded while Bruce Springsteen and the E-Street Band recorded their first studio album since 2012, Letter To You was inspired as Springsteen lost a former bandmate from The Castiles, his band in the 1960’s. The documentary goes between the band playing the songs, and talking about themselves and their history.
My Take: This is a solid musical documentary, but there’s nothing groundbreaking here. It was filmed in 2019, when Springsteen was 70, and there’s no avoiding that this is and old white rocker feeling nostalgic and sharing wisdom and concerns of a life having survived rock and roll. Filmed in black and white, the documentary is comfortable and the music is nice, but it kind of fades into the background even while people are talking. Bruce and 80’s rock fans will love this. Others might turn it on and forget it’s playing.
18 - Little America - Comedy
Summary: A serial about the immigrant experience, Little America tells different stories about the immigrant life in America, from different time periods and different original countries. Whether it be a child prodigy who is left behind when his parents are deported, an African immigrant interested in becoming a cowboy, or a silent retreat where language is not a barrier, this serial tries to tell stories from every background
My Take: With Executive Producers Kumail Nanjiani and Emiliy V. Gordon as the true star power, this anthology series looks at eight different stories about immigrants living in America, all inspired by real life stories. Quality varies per episode, and sometimes it gets a little predictable and repetitive. Still, it has enough high points to work overall. My personal favorites were “The Manager” and “The Grand Prize Expo Winner”, the latter doing an amazing job of humanizing an often-mocked stereotype in media.
17 - The Oprah Conversation - Talk Show
Summary: Oprah’s intended talk show to bring in celebrities and experts and talk to them, but because of the pandemic, it is without a live audience. However, Oprah brings guests in remotely with huge and small screens that feels futuristic, not limiting in the way many pandemic shows have been. Oprah and the guest are in separate spaces but both are professionally filmed, and the limited audience members are present like portraits on the wall in a gallery.
My Take: Of the three Oprah shows, this feels most like “Oprah”. Due to the timing of the show after social upheaval, many episodes take on the subject of race and race relations. But others are oddly promotional, like Mariah Carey (who coincidentally has a holiday special coming with Apple TV) and Matthew McConaughey (and his new book). The episodes about race are particularly worth watching (as a white man, who is often uncomfortable talking about race). This is definitely peak Oprah.
16 - Little Voice - Drama
Summary: Sara Bareilles, Jordy Nelson, and. J.J. Abrams are the powerhouses behind this series, a sweet but not exactly groundbreaking story about a singer-songwriter trying to make it in New York. Bess (Brittany O’Grady) is a songwriter with anxiety about performing, despite a father in the business. As Bess tries to overcome her anxiety, she has to deal with her autistic brother (Kevin Valdez, an actor who is actually on the spectrum), her roommate/best friend, a coworker at the bar who wants to be her manager, a new musician partner, a potential love interest or two, and her alcoholic father and absent mother. That’s all.
My Take: It works on the back of star Brittany O’Grady, and a compelling cast of people around her life, especially Valdez’s performance, which is one of the most realistic portrayals of autism you’ll find. Bareilles wrote the music, which is beautiful as usual. Where the show falters is that it seems like it’s trying to do every single possible story at once, and every episode feels manic. It almost seems to exhaust every possible plot point and stumbling block in one season. But O’Grady and the music help you keep watching.
15 - The Banker - Drama (Movie)
Summary: Inspired by a true story, this movie follows Bernard Garrett (Anthony Mackie), an African-American prodigy, as he makes himself a success in Los Angeles real estate in the 1950’s and 60’s, and tries to move into banking in his home state of Texas. He and his wife (Nia Long) partners with businessman Joe Morris (Samuel L. Jackson) and white front-man Matt Steiner (Nicholas Hoult) to try and succeed in two racist industries.
My Take: One of Apple TV’s first movies, The Banker has big name stars in Avengers stars Mackie and Jackson and a big-time story. The movie is fast paced and at times feels like skimming a book. It doesn’t skimp on laughs in the first half (with Jackson providing his own laugh track), but it does get much more serious in the second half as it and the characters directly address the racism around them. This is the first Apple TV+ movie that feels distinctly “Hollywood”, both in style in structure. That helps raise ATV+’s profile, but it puts limits this film as well. It’s a good story and worth watching, but is not ground-breaking, and clearly is not an in-depth or entirely accurate look at the story.
It was also a source of a major controversy, as the movie’s release was delayed by allegations of childhood sexual abuse were levied against Bernard Garrett Jr., the son of the main character and a producer on the film, by his half sisters and their mother.
14 - Tehran - Thriller
Summary: An “Apple Original” in title only, this show was made in Israel for their public channel Kan 11, and Apple purchased the international rights. It follows Tamar Rabinyan (Niv Sultan), a young Jewish spy who was born in Iran, as she is inserted into Tehran to try and neutralize Iran’s air defenses so Israel can bomb their nuclear plant. The plot is foiled in the first episode, and Tamar is sent on the run in an enemy city, pursued by the head investigator of the Revolutionary Guard Faraz Kamali (Shaun Toub).
My Take: In many ways, this is a fairly standard spy thriller. There’s a mission, it goes wrong, and everyone is sent scrambling. Tehran gets points, from this American viewer, for exploring the largely unexplored environment of urban Iran (albeit filmed in Athens). The characters switch between Hebrew, Farsi, and English very quickly, which is challenging to hearead. But ultimately, this is a personal spy story of pawns in a bigger war, as the scope grows with each episode. There’s plenty of grey in every side of this conflict. Even with the scope, Tehran gets bogged down and the middle episodes feel filled with filler. Ultimately, it’s solid, and does feel different than most spy shows. And though we get a satisfying resolution, the door is left open for season 2, which is as yet officially unannounced (but reported that they are signed on for two more seasons).
13 - Boys State - Documentary (Movie)
Summary: Every year, young men are brought together in the Texas State Capitol for what is basically a political science camp, where they are broken into their own political parties, and must come up with a platform and compete in an election for roles inspired by state government. During it, these 16-18-year old boys must work together while competing against each other, and learning what politics are.
My Take: A documentary about young men’s mock political competition in Texas, you’ve probably just envisioned something about what this looks like, and no doubt, you’ll probably see exactly that in this documentary. But this Sundance Documentary-winning film doesn’t quite go the way you think, but also close enough that it might not matter. These teens have more nuance than I would’ve expected, and I wish adults had in politics. But it has too much nuance to be received well, I think. Still, if you want a reason to watch this, I’d put money that at least one of the featured boys in this becomes a politician of note in the near future. Also, I am interested in seeing a documentary about the same event for girls, Girls State.
12 - Tiny World - Documentary
Summary: Narrated by Ant-Man’s Paul Rudd, Tiny World takes a look at the world of small animals living in diverse natural habitats around the world. Ranging from the African savannah to the Australian outback to the north American backyard, the show features animals from monkeys that can fit in the palm of your hand, down to the ants that are ever-present.
My Take: Nature documentaries are everywhere, but the cinematography on this is mind-blowing to the point you truly wonder how some of this was shot. Clearly, a large amount of it was manipulated, with rare parts where the CGI shows through, but it doesn’t take away from just how beautiful the shots are. With Rudd’s occasionally wry narration, it makes this a nature documentary that competes with the best stuff on Netflix. The nature never gets too gory, but it does deal with the life and death (sometimes brutal) of tiny nature. And it’s even a great follow-up to the movie “The Elephant Queen” because the first episode features what could be the same dung beetle that featured in that movie! (The movie and this series were not done by the same company, though, so it might just be a look-alike dung beetle they hired.)
11 - Beastie Boys Story - Documentary
Summary: A telling of the Beastie Boys career, by the surviving members Mike “Mike D” Diamond and Adam “Ad-Rock” Horovitz themselves. Directed by Spike Jonze, this documentary is shot as the two tell their story to a live audience in a theater, alternating between them on stage laughing and joking around, and video sequences they narrate about their career, and their friends, especially the late Adam “MCA” Yauch.
My Take: This is such an unusual format for a documentary, and it works so well. It allows for some of the goofing off that one might expect from the stars, but it’s still coherent and interesting, especially for me as a casual fan of the band growing up. On a service with a lot of traditionally-made documentaries, this stands out because of both its style and its quality, and if you like pop music at all, you should enjoy this.
10 - For All Mankind - Drama
Summary: An alternate history series based off a simple question: What if the Soviet Union beat America to the moon? From Battlestar Galactica’s Ronald D. Moore, the answer is that the Americans, more competitive than ever, try to push for more ambitious goals than just landing on the moon and leaving.
My Take: One of the first Apple TV shows, it is a sometimes nerdy but very interesting look at the space race. It balances fictional characters with real life figures (sometimes making interesting decisions when changing their fate), and really tries to focus on the science side of science fiction. The show jumps across years of development, so it’s not as tedious and slow as it could be. It hasn’t captured fans’ imaginations as much as it obviously has its creators’ imaginations, but it’s a quality drama that could get better in future seasons, although it is clearly now swerving to the fiction side of science fiction.
9 - Home Before Dark - Drama
Summary: Hilde Lisko (Brooklynn Prince) is a 9-year old daughter of a journalist who wants to do what he does. When her family moves from New York to her father’s small hometown in Washington, she stumbles onto a mysterious death and does what any reporter would do: writes about it in her blog. But as the mystery expands to her father’s past, she challenges an entire city’s reluctance to face up to a tragedy from decades ago, in the name of journalism.
My Take: A dark horse series that did not get much press, Home Before Dark seems like a show for kids, but is a show is made for adults, with a mystery of twists and turns more like Gone Girl than any children’s show. Prince is the star of this show and keeps viewers attached, even as the mystery’s twists get harder to follow. The show is vaguely inspired by a real life young journalist, but realistically is not at all the same story. It doesn’t matter, as this is as much about family and youthful stubbornness as anything else.
8 - Dickinson - Comedy
Summary: A historical comedy-drama about the life of poet Emily Dickinson (Hailee Steinfeld), this show follows her as a modern-thinking woman in a restrictive 19th century setting, growing up as a teenager. It shows both what’s going on around her, and into her imaginative flights of fancy as she deals with romantic trysts, less-than-friendly friends, and restrictive parents (notably Jane Krakowski as her mother Emily).
My Take: One of the first series from Apple TV+, Dickinson is an ambitious series, but shifts between being a period piece with setting-appropriate acting, and characters acting like modern people but set in the past. As great as parts are, it does struggle with focus and tone, particularly John Mulaney’s guest role as Henry David Thoreau, which feels better suited for a Will Ferrell absurdist comedy than what this show is trying to be. Steinfeld shines in the lead role, but Ella Hunt as Dickinson’s best friend Sue and Jane Krakowski as her mother both are fantastic. The relationship between Dickinson and her best friend Sue, and hints about Dickinson’s deteriorating mental health, are both handled very well. This is a show that has a chance to really find its footing in future seasons.
7 - Greyhound - Action (Movie)
Summary: Captain Ernest Krause (Tom Hanks) has been given command of a destroyer, and a convoy of supply ships to cross the U-Boat infested Atlantic early in World War II. Without air cover, he spends days awake, attempting to outmaneuver an enemy he can not see, or even count. As ships in his convoy are attacked one by one, he must save as many as he can before getting back under the protective air cover from Great Britain.
My Take: A movie that really was meant for the big screen, Greyhound is not interested in your character development or subplots or mandatory romances (mostly). After an initial scene introducing Krause in the lone bit of character development, this movie is about the tense travel of the Atlantic with submarines hunting you. It never shows the human villains, only the occasional peak at the metal beasts when they surface. It also doesn’t jump between ships on this convoy. Strictly a single viewpoint, which makes for a fascinatingly and a little fatiguingly tense film that is shorter than it feels (only 91 minutes!) because of the thrills. This movie is a fantastically different take on the war films we know, and especially for those with military experience, a strong film.
6 - Servant - Drama
Summary: Without significant spoilers, the show focuses on a couple who recently suffered the loss of a child, and have undertaken a real doll therapy, where they take care of a doll to help the psychological effects of losing a child, and go so far as to bring in a mysterious young girl to be the doll’s nanny. Over the span of the series, secrets about the nanny, and the troubles of the couple themselves, slowly leak out.
My Take: M. Night Shymalan’s first television show is a return to the Shymalan of his early years. With the space of a series instead of a movie, Shymalan has the room to explore each character: the almost-grieving mother (Lauren Ambrose), the disaffected and disbelieving husband (Toby Kebbell), the mysterious nanny (Nell Tiger Free), and the doubtful brother of the wife (Rupert Grint, Ron from Harry Potter), who acts as an outside world anchor. By the end, it feels a bit as if the original mystery has become a subplot, but it’s left on a cliffhanger the will leap the plot forward. And throughout the series, Shymalan allows food to be a visual cue and cinematographic toy, setting the mood. This ranks as one of Shymalan’s better stories from his long career.
5 - Visible: Out on Television - Documentary (Miniseries)
Episodes: 5; Stauts: Completed
Summary: A documentary series about how all facets of LGBTQ people have been represented on television, from the 1950’s through today. As a series, the documentary takes time with many the facets of every letter in LGBTQ, and all the letters hidden within it, talking about struggles of people of color. With interviews and clips, it takes it’s time with different eras and weaves it all together. And it’s all done with an undertone of how storytelling works, and the tool that television is, both for misinformation but also for connection.
My Take: Making this a series really allows the time to give this topic the time to really explore it. It’s an engaging documentary, especially for anyone who’s spent any time watching television. There’s nuggets of memory for all of us, where we can connect to the shows we used to watch, both their flaws and triumphs. Certain critics might point to this as Apple trying to force representation down our throats, but this documentary is excellent at telling a compelling story with both history and context.
4 - The Morning Show - Drama
Summary: Apple TV+’s centerpiece, with superstar stars Reese Witherspoon, Jennifer Aniston, and Steve Carrell, and yet a scene-stealing supporting cast of Gugu Mbahta-Raw, Billy Crudup (who won an Emmy for his role), Mark Duplass, and Jack Davenport (who is never not good), the show is about a, believe it or not, morning show whose male lead is fired in a sexual misconduct scandal and the after-effects. Witherspoon’s character is unexpectedly brought in to replace him, as power battles go on behind the scenes with everyone from the network head down to the assistant producers, as the secrets spill out about the truth.
My Take: What could be a preachy show about the MeToo movement never gets that way, and attempts a nuanced discussion about the less clear-cut issues. It’s not done perfectly, as some conflicts from the episodic storyline seem to disappear in the next episode, and Mitch is frustratingly (and probably intentionally) likable even as he is hate-able, with Carell showing his range. One flaw of this show is that the extremely likable supporting cast pulls attention away from Aniston and Witherspoon, the former being appropriately lauded with praise but not getting enough to win awards, and the latter getting a little stuck in her character spot. The season finale flurry hits hard, even if it doesn’t feel completely earned, but this show has definitely become the first bankable piece ATV+ has.
3 - Defending Jacob - Drama (Miniseries)
Summary: A boy is murdered, and after an investigation, suspicion falls on one of his classmates, Jacob, who is the son of Andy Barber, one of the assistant district attorneys (Chris Evans). Andy and his wife Laurie (Michelle Dockery) must do their best to defend their son, investigating other leads, but also facing the possibility that their son is guilty, and hiding family secrets.
My Take: Starring Captain America’s Chris Evans, Defending Jacob became the summer hit for Apple TV+, drawing viewers in. The tension between Andy and his wife Laurie, and their slightly creepy son Jacob (Jaeden Martell) as the teen is accused of murder, is filled with tension and, unlike many of the series on Apple TV, comes to a full conclusion in one season. Fans of mysteries like Gone Girl will appreciate this series. Although it can feel slightly stretched, this series hits hard and makes the most of its star power.
2 - Mythic Quest: Raven’s Banquet - Comedy
Summary: Mythic Quest is an online game akin to World of Warcraft, and it’s launching a new expansion to keep its fans engaged. The studio is led by a charmingly sycophantic designer Ian (pronounced EYE-an, played by Rob Mcelhenney), and lead engineer Poppy (Charlotte Nicdao). With a staff of obsessive assistants, disinterested programmers, earnest game testers, snippy game streamers, and an elderly lead writer lost in technology, the show hops along the daily struggles of keeping a game going and its fans happy.
My Take: An absolute home run of a show, as one would expect from the team behind It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Mythic Quest is absurdist comedy at its best, with McElhenney and a breakout performance from Nicdao. However, it’s also an ensemble cast with no weak spots, and a wonderfully obvious premise that is contemporary. It is at its best in two standalone episodes. The first comes out of nowhere, not featuring the main cast but instead acts as a “How the Game Industry Got Here” prequel in heartbreakingly personal fashion. The second is a special Quarantine episode that was perhaps the best quarantine-focused special episode done anywhere.
1 - Ted Lasso - Comedy
Summary: An American Football coach is inexplicably hired as a Soccer…er, real Football coach in the Premiere League in London. The titular Lasso is genuine and earnest, openly saying he doesn’t think winning has to do with the score, and he faces a soccer world where the opposite is true. He faces disbelieving players, abusive fans, unsure team staff, and a devious owner, but he barely blinks in the face of it all, and tries to keep his team from relegation…once he learns what that means.
My Take: An absolute surprise of a show, based on NBC Sports comedy promos, that has no right to be so great. Ted Lasso is on its face a fish-out-of-water sports show about an American football coach going to Europe to coach football/soccer. But it’s really a movie about a polite man in an impolite world, and bending rather than breaking, and sticking to your principles. It’s not laugh out loud funny, but it is surprisingly emotional. It’s also a show that champions maturity in a way that hits harder in a 2020 world, and so it’s also very well-timed. The only problem with Ted Lasso the show is that even though it gives Apple TV+ a recognizable character to market, it’s not a must-subscribe show. But it’s unquestionably one of Apple TV+’s best.

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